For the Love of Editing

I love editing. There, I've said. I love editing and I don't care who knows it. I love fiddling around with scenes and layering in little bits here and there, or even cutting out a scene that didn't work and rewriting it. In fact, in many ways, getting that first draft down for me is the hardest part. Once it's down, at least the bare bones are there and I can fiddle.

Maybe this goes back to being the kid who spent more time drawing little borders around her school work than actually doing the work. Or happily playing around with designing pamphlets when I used to work in the library (as opposed to actually writing the content). Yep, there was something satisfying in fiddling with stuff.

Anyway, I've finally finished the rewrite of a story I wrote during Nano the year before last and am now having fun with editing it. I loved the story - especially the idea and I loved the hero. But sadly when I wrote it, I was still getting the hang of conflict and so the characters...well....they didn't have any. However, I've learned a lot in the past six months and now I think I have the story to where I want it to be. As in there is actual conflict in there!
Of course because of having actual conflict, I had to change large parts of the story completely. I think in all there were three chapters I kept, plus a few minor plot points and then the rest I rewrote entirely from scratch. This will be my next sub so I hope it works. Of course, the only person who can say for certain that it does work is the editor and as I'm still waiting on news of my partial, I won't be getting any feedback for this story any time soon. Ah well, in the meantime I'll have fun with my editing and then perhaps think about which story I'll concentrate on next. After all, the best thing to do while waiting is more writing right?

So, how do you find editing? Do you spend your time drawing pretty borders around your work or do you hate that bit? ;-)

Being Too Self Aware About Self Awareness

I have done a post about this before, I realise, but I think it's worth posting about again since I know a little bit more about it than I did before. And also I have finally finished the major rewrite of my next potential sub and self awareness was a particular bugbear in that one, as it has been in all my mss to be honest.

You see, when I was a little baby writer, I used to get really annoyed with characters that seemed wholly blind to their problems. So my characters would always know what their problems were. Most of the time, they knew and still acted like idiots (my heroes here) because they were so tortured and well, just generally angsty. This was before I knew about conflict, about action, about pace, about anything really! I know a lot more about that stuff now so it came as a bit of a surprise to me that, as a big grown-up writer, I was still making my characters too self aware.

So, what is all this self awareness stuff? It's being aware of your feelings and the reasons for them basically. For example, my hero wants to succeed in his business. It's his goal. If pushed, he might admit that his drive to succeed is based on leaving behind a troubled youth. But what he wouldn't admit to is that his drive to succeed is based on a fear that he's really no good because his father walked out on him when he was young. He wouldn't admit to it because he doesn't actually know that at the beginning of the book. Unless you're me of course, who did actually make him know that in the first chapter! The problem with this is that if they know their fears right at the beginning there wouldn't be any sense of discovery about the character. Plus the fact that if they know their problems right at the beginning, why don't they do something about them right then and there? And you also lose any emotional impact because there is no slow revelation or sudden insight by the character about their behaviour.

Anyway, the upshot of this is that I have to learn to pull back on the awareness. I found myself getting into trouble with this rewrite because of that and it meant because I had made my hero too self aware too early, I had to give him another problem so he would still grow and change. Which meant I complicated the conflict. Remember the KISS principle? Keep It Simple Stupid.

Now, all this might sound as though I'm making my characters do stuff instead of being guided by them. That may be true but I don't think I'm doing it this time. If I think about it, my character is an alpha male who wants to prove himself. Admitting he's scared of not being good enough would be something he would never admit to. So making him aware of this fear too early on IS making him do something he doesn't want to do.

All this stuff about self awareness is making me appreciate the layers of the onion metaphor that Kate Walker talks about. I knew what she meant, but I never really saw it in my own work until now.

So, what does everyone else think about this? Are your characters too self aware like mine? Or are they appropriately dense? :-)

Niceness for Valentine's Day

Here on the right we have a lovely Russian icon type picture of Saint Valentine. Why? Because obviously it's that day that all romance writers like - Valentine's Day! Now, the reasons a day celebrating love is associated with an old Roman saint are a little unclear (at least according to that well known and totally truthful source, Wikipedia), I am nevertheless happy that due to this ancient tradition, I am now the owner of some absolutely divine chocolates. There is a French chocolatier up the road, who uses Valrhona chocolate to make some of the best chocolate in Auckland (nay, New Zealand itself!) and guess who gave them to me?
No, not my secret fancy man. It's the dear Dr Jax, who looked very surprised when I wished him happy Valentine's this morning. He's on call today you see and I thought he'd forgotten. Well, he had. But he had not forgotten the day before when he'd bought my little pressie. Yes, I am spoiled. I even got two Valentine's cards from my lovely girls (and no, they will not be sharing my chocolate). And what's more, I am going to celebrate by totally torturing my hero with the fact that he is falling in love and he so does not want to. Mwwwwahahahah.

Now, I don't use celebrities to cast my characters cause I find the real person gets in the way of the fictional one, but I do like a bit of eye candy now and then. So here on the left, as a little Valentine's Day present to myself (and to those of you who like him too!) is Josh Holloway from Lost, doing his bit for Davidoff. I'm writing a bad boy at the moment and you can't get a more charming bad boy alpha than Sawyer. Mmmm.... Nicer than a Russian icon in my opinion...


So what about you guys? Was your Valentine's romantic?

What Would An Alpha Male Do?

So Dr Jax had a significant birthday this week and I took the liberty of booking us a room at Auckland's Hilton hotel for the night. I'll just say this now - it was for his birthday but, obsessive writer that I am, it was also research since the characters of my current WIP also visit said hotel. It was a gorgeous room with views across the harbour (when not blocked by the vast cruise ships that moor alongside the hotel), perfect for my characters - though I think I'll make the room a LOT bigger. A suite maybe. And yes, I took pictures of both the room and the view to help with scene setting. Like I said, research.

We had dinner at the very swanky restaurant and - here's another example of just how obsessive I am when it comes to writing - had an unfortunately hilarious moment when the waiter spilled a glass of Moet all over me. And I mean, ALL over me. The poor man was showering me with napkins (after showering me with champagne) and fussing round while I dried my hair with a fourth napkin, all the while thinking, 'I wonder if I could work this into a book?'. The whole restaurant was gawking at me but all I could think about was writing! And then, when I told Dr Jax that I was thinking about how I could use this in a scene, he asked 'so what would an alpha male do in this situation?'. And instantly I was thinking constructing a new story...

So, thank you clumsy waiter at White restaurant. Your waiting skills leave a lot to be desired but at least you've given me an opening scene for a new book. Heroine gets expensive champagne spilled on her in a swanky, upmarket hotel restaurant. She's utterly soaked, horribly embarassed, and along comes the hero and....??

What do you reckon? What would an alpha male do?

What To Think About When You're Not Thinking About It

Okay, so the NTAI ain't going so well. Ridiculous since it's only been five weeks since I submitted the thing but there you go. So, what does one do when one is trying to Not Think About It?
I usually write. I write like the dickens. There is something about totally losing yourself in a new story and when I do, I forget all about my sub and everything else (including the little things like feeding the kids and making sure they haven't killed each other).

This is not a problem but I have been thinking about whether I should branch out and try something else. Try writing for a different category. That way I can have more subs out there (and true, more to NTAI!). There are downsides to this, mainly if you do get something accepted, the eds will want to establish you in one line rather than have your name associated with a couple and perhaps getting readers confused. Also, the requirements for the different lines are quite different and it's as well to concentrate on mastering one line first.

However, my problem is that I write really fast. If everything is worked out beforehand, I can write a first draft in two weeks. This is a good thing because while waiting, I can churn out a couple of mss to have at the ready in case of rejection. However, if I've done that and it turns out I have six month wait before hearing back, maybe I should be using the time to try writing and querying something else?

I'm still undecided. Modern Heat is where I want to be first and foremost, and my main focus is on that. But it would be nice to be waiting on more than one sub...

Whaddya reckon?

We Shall Fight

We shall fight on the beaches,
We shall fight on the landing grounds,
We shall fight in the fields and in the streets,
We shall fight in the hills;
We shall never surrender.

Thanks Winston. So why am I fighting? Well, my last post was grade A whine material. Now, I was going to apologise for that but I figure part of waiting - for me at least - involves a minor vent and/or whine every now and then, and that was my whine for January. I'll be allowed one for Febuary but I'll give myself a bit of time to build up to it. ;-)

Anyway, the fighting speech is mainly due to a lovely comment Natalie Anderson left on my blog in response to said whine. In fact all of you who read my monotonous musings left great comments, for which I think you very much, but it was Natalie's that really got to me. 'You're a fighter' she said. Thanks for the reminder, Natalie! Because you're right. I am a fighter. I don't like letting things alone or letting things go. I hate stuff getting the better of me. Especially stuff I'm good at! And if there's one thing I have learned over the Year of the R (2009) is that I can write.

So, forwith the Battle Plan:

1. Strategically attack and conquer Laurie Schnebly Campbell's Plotting for Motivation course this month.
2. Decimate current WIP by finishing the rewrite and then beat into submission the partial.
3. Cunningly deploy my forces to surround the current crop of new story ideas, winnow the wheat from the chaff, sort out the men from the boys, and decide which WIP shall be the new WIP.
4. Sack and burn the city of TAI, sowing the conquered ground with salt so that NOTHING shall grow. Build new city called NTAI of which I shall be the supreme ruler.
5. Eat more Kohu Road dark chocolate icecream.
6. Storm Kohu Road icecream company, secure ALL their stocks of dark chocolate icecream and enforce martial law whereby they will have to make dark chocolate icecream for me alone.
7. Send out spies for a reconnaissance mission to the London offices of Mills and Boon.
8. Lay out honey traps using Kohu Road dark chocolate icecream.
9. Wait for the editors to fall for said honey traps and the watch the contracts to roll in.
10. Become supreme ruler of the world.

Okay, so there's a bit of a jump between numbers 9 and 10 but it's doable, right?

:-)

Riding the Rollercoaster

Hmmm, despite my happy 'I love rejections' post, the crows of doubt have come to roost again. Par for the course. No surprises there. To be honest, the constant ups and downs are very tiring. It does tend to be my personality (hello! Gemini!) but I have been kind of thinking, 'do I need stress like this in my life?'. At the very beginning of the year I did tell my husband that I wished I'd never started submitting. That the whole rollercoaster ride was getting a bit much for me.

Then again, I guess that's the hazard when you go after your dreams. It's going to be tough and disappointing, and you will wonder why on earth you thought it was a good idea. Especially when your goal is just as far off as it ever was.

Anyway, this is not a play for sympathy or anything, just a little vent. Sunday morning musings. I am trying to resist the urge to reread my partial, just to make sure I'm as happy with it now as I was when I sent it off but that way lies madness. I have finished the full and the basic conflict seemed to hang together okay which is a good sign but you just never know.

Oh well, will stop moaning. How's everyone else doing? What do you do when the rollercoaster gets too much for you?

How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Rejections

No, I haven't had my partial rejected. I really, really hope it won't be but nothing is ever certain when it comes to publishing. However, if it does get the big ole R, I hope people will remind me of this post because I'm currently trying to get my head around loving my rejections.
This is something I do when the wait is getting to me and I'm feeling down about my writing, and wishing I'd known more with the manuscript that was so nearly there but didn't end up making it.

Why? Surely there's nothing happy making about a rejection? Actually, the first rejection I got was happy making and started me on the road to taking my writing seriously. It was from the Instant Seduction Contest and the wonderful editor told me I had potential, that my voice was Modern Heat, and that though they didn't want to see any more of my contest entry (just as well since I hadn't written it), they'd be happy to look at anything else I had. Well, I was over the moon! Yes, I had potential! I expected to hear nothing at all from this contest and I was so thrilled. So off I sent my next partial.

Along come rejection number 2. I was unsurprised since I'd already by that time (having actually read some Modern Heats!) figured out it wasn't a goer. But still, they told me what was wrong with it and they wanted more. So off I sent another partial, while at the same time, entering the Feel the Heat contest. This was where things got serious. I got more feedback from FTH. I began to learn about internal conflict. Still hadn't got it though, my entry was rejected (rejection number 3). But they saw potential in the other partial that I'd send before the contest. I was asked for the full.

So I sent away my first full and back it came with revisions. My heroine needed conflict. I was learning, but I struggled with that. It was so hard. I hadn't learned that rewriting needed to be done, that adding conflict would change the character, that once you change the character, the plot might change too. And proper conflict still eluded me. I still didn't understand. I got a second lot of revisions but the conflict jigsaw still wasn't complete. I still didn't get it.

Rejection number 4 was very hard. The ms was so nearly there but I didn't have the knowledge I needed to make it work and the editors knew it. But now I could see why it hadn't worked. It was becoming clearer. Thinking I had it, I dived into another partial. Yes, surely I had the conflict now. But I was still thinking of the conflict as a thing separate from my characters. I wasn't looking at my characters as whole people, just as receptacles for the conflict I'd thought up.

So back came rejection number 5. Even harder than rejection number 4 in many ways. But the one thing about it was that finally I was beginning to see my problem. And it made me very determined to learn how to fix it. With rejection number 5 also came advice from Michelle Styles about synopses and about the actions and reactions characters take. Another piece of the jigsaw fell into place.

This time I sent off just a synopsis, after much hard work. Didn't get a rejection this time but a warning - think about your characters. You are not telling the story of a particular conflict, you are telling the story of two people. So who are these people? Why are they the way they are? Why are we even interested? And more light dawned. Conflict and character suddenly became much clearer. I felt I'd taken another big step forward. So finally I wrote the partial and sent it off.

I'd love to end this post with a full request but I can't since I don't know yet. However this time I'm taking nothing for granted. I may still be missing a part of the jigsaw, one I can't see yet. But one thing I'm sure of, if that very first ms had been accepted, I would be struggling to write a second. I have learned SO much in the past year though the rejections I've had that I truly don't know if I would have had a second accepted. The rejections have been horrible, gut-wrenching and depressing. But they've also been amazingly helpful, encouraging and focussing, and I would not have learned all that I have if I hadn't had them.

Of course if this partial is rejected, I will give up. Okay? Cause one can only love rejections so much. ;-)

(Yes. I'm kidding. So far).

Putting the E Back Into Sex

The E is the emotion I'm talking about, not some...um...other E. Ahem, moving right along, MH is a very sexy line. Lots of opportunities for action. And personally I really like writing a good love scene. I tend to put a lot of sensuality in mine to really build it up. I've been told by the ed I write a good one too (blows own trumpet here 'cause someone's got to!) which is pleasing.
So when I was told the emphasis was too heavy on the sex in the last reject, I was puzzled.
Hey, I thought. Whaddya expect? It was a once night stand, ergo, sex. Anyway, you liked the writing, so what was wrong with it? Too much heat? Or didn't the one nighter work out? Did they get together too quickly? What? What exactly did you mean by 'too much emphasis on sex'??

The problem, gentle reader, has only now sunk in. Having borrowed Maisey's editor decoder ring, I went back over the rejection letter and there it was in black and white - there was no emotion in the scene. What? No emotion? There was plenty! They enjoyed themselves didn't they? Oh sure, but we're not just talking pleasure here, we're talking emotion that is related to the conflict. As Michelle S told me, every scene has to forward the conflict on some level, and that includes the love scenes. So I quickly looked at the rough draft of my Cat/Sean ms to see what I'd done with the love scene. I'd really gone to town with it and it was pretty sexy but sure enough, I'd made the same mistake. No conflict!

Doh!

Glad I picked that one up huh? So how to put conflict in a love scene? Pretty much the same as you do with every scene. What's their conflict? How does that come out during love making? What kind of action would the conflict impel them to take and what would the response be and why? So I've got a guy who likes control with a woman who threatens it. And a spontaneous, impulsive woman who wants an emotional connection with a guy who is trying to deny it. Don't know about you, but I can see all sorts of possibilities there... :-)

Anyway, I think the real reason this has taken a while to sink in for me is that as a writer I am the queen of understatement. I don't like writing OTT emotional reactions, especially during love scenes. Which is why I didn't put them in. But, as one of Trish Wylie's lessons pointed out, you can never be too obvious. So I'm going to have to give up my love of the understated look or the many layered piece of dialoge and just be straight up. And boy are those two going to have emotional stuff going on in their scene - I'm going to wring that baby dry.

But if the ed wants to read it, she'll have to ask for the full. ;-)

BTW guys, the old sex without emotion thing was one of the problems the eds mentioned with many of the entries from the last competition. So the lesson is, yes, you can have the sex, but make sure that conflict is front and centre in the scene.

The Joy of Rewrites

You may have noticed that I'm not updating my word count bars (or you may not have. You may have better things to do than to check my word count bars!). The simple reason is that I am rewriting and find it too complex dicking around with existing word counts as opposed to rewrite word counts. Anyway, what has been interesting for me is not so much the word counts as the rewriting part. And it's brought me face to face with the reason my revised full was rejected last year.

I didn't rewrite enough.

What I tried to do was to put entirely new conflict into an existing plot structure. I went so far as to write new dialogue and even changed how a scene went. But what I should have done is REWRITE THE ENTIRE THING!

Yes indeedy folks, that would have been the answer. Why? Because with with new conflict, your character becomes a different person. And therefore they would have different responses. Which may mean some scenes are no longer relevant. If you have an existing plot structure, the temptation is to try and keep it, no matter that it may no longer work. And that's when you run into problems because then you start trying to force the characters into behaving the way you want them to instead of how they actually would naturally.

Ah well, I guess that's all part of the learning process. And the main thing is that I now have no qualms about starting from scratch. What I need to do is instead of putting new bits into the old, I need to start with a fresh slate and, if appropriate, but old bits into the new. It certainly has been working for me so far. I am rewriting another favourite ms of mine that will be my next sub and certainly starting afresh seems the best way to tackle it. That way you're not trapped by the stuff you've already written. Starting it new leaves you wide open for all sorts of possibilities.

So how does everyone view rewrites? Is it a chance to make your story stronger? Or is it something that would give you nightmares?

Bad Boys

Here's an interesting question for you: what bad stuff do you think a hero can get away with doing?

The crit group and I were discussing this as I have an ms with a bad boy in it, a bad boy who has left all the bad stuff behind physically but not mentally. Now I'm talking about his teens here, where he went off the rails and got into some trouble. He pulled himself out of it and is now a successful businessman (aren't they all?) but he still feels guilty about this stuff - especially as the heroine persists in thinking he's a great guy but doesn't know about some of the things he did (no this is not the whole of the conflict by the way, it's just a layer).

What I wanted to know was what's acceptable in terms of 'bad stuff'? Obviously violence towards women and kids is a huge no no. So what else? It has to be something that he would feel very bad about but not serious enough to warrant being arrested and going to jail for years and years. And clearly needs to leave him still feeling awful as an adult. The crit group gave me some great ideas but what I'd like to know is what is your particular line in the sand? Is it drugs? Violence (unfemale related)? Alcohol related crimes? Robbery?

Or is it all in the execution?

Kreativ Blog Award

Both Kaily Hart and Romy Sommer have nominated me for a Kreativ Blog award - thanks for the kudos guys! - so I'd better get on with it eh? I have to reveal 7 interesting things about me and pass it on to 7 other bloggers. Righto...

7 interesting things about me (well, at least semi-interesting):

1. I took singing lessons and entered competitions (wearing my Doc Martens) when I was in my 20s. Singing opera. Needless to say I don't sing any more, except to my iPod and not opera. I actually still like opera but these days I'm a bit more alternative. ;-)

2. I am a gadget girl (surprise, surprise). Love my iPod, my iPhone, and my PC. I'm now after an ereader.

3. I play computer games. Not so much these days now I write, but I used to love playing The Sims and any fantasy adventure game. I also quite like playing Halo on the xBox (but only with my friends whom I can shoot).

4. I used to swim competitively in my teens. And I hated it (though I still love swimming for fun) which is why I quit.

5. I can ski moderately well. A fact that continues to surprise me whenever I put on a pair of skis as I'm useless with most sports!

6. I love reading Science Fiction. I have umpteen dozen beginnings for many SF stories but never finished any of them. Combining SF and romance would be the best. Sadly M&B have no SF Romance category.

7. I travelled quite a bit when I was overseas years ago. The most unusual place I went to was St Petersburg for two weeks. This may or may not be interesting but I don't meet many Kiwis who have been to Russia.

Seven blogs to nominate (and I'm nominating people here who may not have had this award yet):

Lorraine Wilson
Rachel Johns
Maisey Yates
Joanne Cleary
Judy Jarvie
Suzanne Jones
Lacey Devlin

Heeeerrrre's Jackie!

Hey everyone, I'm back. After 10 days of sea, sand, sandcastles and waaaay too much bubbly, it's back to reality again. To the right there is a small picture of Pataua, the little beach settlement where my husband has a family beach house. It was built by his grandfather way back in the 1930's so it's no palatial mansion. It's what we call a typical Kiwi bach - no TV, tank water which means no showers, no broadband (sniff), and a long drop loo. Oh, okay, there is a flushing loo there now but the long drop is still going. ;-) Anyway, it's pretty much fabulous, made even better by the fact that my iPhone still appeared to receive emails! Yes, I am a very sad person that I cannot even be away one week without checking.

The other sad thing about me is that I cannot even be on holiday without writing. I finished re-writing the rest of Cat and Sean's story while I was away. I just got all inspired. It requires a tremendous amount of editing but the bones are there which is very cool. AND I got a new story idea too. Great holiday or what?

I also did some reading and may I say that Natalie Anderson's To Love, Honour and Disobey (out on ebook via M&B UK) is one fabulous read. Really believable characters, great conflict, fab story. So go out and buy it. Yes, go on. Right now. :-)

As for me, I now have to decide which of my many projects to get on with. I have five... ;-)

Chocks Away!

It's done. Cat and Sean are winging their way to London. Hope they like it over there. Hope the ed likes them. They're really a lovely couple. Much nicer now I know them properly. Sean has been re-alpha'd because the ed warned me not to make him too good. And Cat has been de-immatured.
They have issues though, issues they really need to work through, and I hope they get the chance for their HEA.

Seriously, one thing I'll say for this partial is that it's waaay better than the last one. At least, I think it is. And that's mainly because I know my characters a lot better. Those character bios were a godsend and I can't think why I didn't do them earlier. Maybe one day I won't need them but for now, until I get a handle on this conflict drama, I'll do one for each new story. Before I start writing.

Right, so now I can kick back and relax on the beach holiday we're going on tomorrow. For maybe five minutes. :-) Will get web withdrawal I'm sure of it - which is why I'll be visiting the local WIFI hotspot frequently. Am also taking my trusty laptop so I can rewrite the rest of Cat and Sean's story in the hope they'll want the rest of it. Nothing like starting 2010 with a bit of optimism!

Hope you all have a lovely week or two. Here's to NTAI!

New Year's Eve vs My Partial

Right, well, I suppose I should be thinking about resolutions and whatnot, it being New Year's Eve today. Thing is, I'm not paying attention to anything much (including the kids) because I am totally immersed in fiddling with my partial. In fact, I'd like to give New Year's Eve a total miss so I can get this sucker done and away before we head up north. Is that sad or what?

Anyway, I suppose I should get into the spirit of it and list my goals for 2010:

1. Get published.

2. Get published.

3. Get published.

4. Get published.

5. You getting the idea?

6. Get published.

7. I think you are by now.

8. Get published.

9. Eat chocolate (fooled you there for a minute).

10. Yep, you guessed it, get published.

Here's to a very happy 2010 for everyone! May we all realise at least one of our goals. I can definitely predict that number 9 on my list will come true. :-)

The iPhone Cometh

Yes indeed, Dr Jax came through. There was a large box waiting under the tree for me on Christmas Day and Dr Jax told me to be careful with it as it was heavy and fragile. I was a bit suspicious because he sometimes tricks me by putting small boxes in large ones and I was hoping that the large box was a trick. But then it was very heavy. So I was putting on my determined 'so it's not an iPhone but I will like whatever it is if it kills me' face while I opened the box. And inside was a heavy, rusty piece of iron grille. And underneath that was the iPhone.
My hero. Sigh. :-)

And I had another piece of happy news on Christmas Day too. I had emailed my completed character bios to the editor the night before and was not expecting a reply until next week at the very earliest. But in my inbox on Christmas Day (yes, I turned my PC on, on Christmas Day. Yes I am sad) was a reply saying she'd read them and thought they were good! And that my conflict looked fine and I was to send through my revised synopsis and partial!

So big relief for me. Finally I have some characters that will work and a conflict that looks good from the editors point of view. There were a few issues that she told me to keep an eye out for but I'm hopeful I can avoid them. Now all I have to do is to write a partial that she likes! Easy peasy lemon squeezy.

Yeah, right. :-)

Hope everyone's Christmas was a happy one and here's to a New Year filled with what you love to do best.

A Good Old Kiwi Christmas

That blaze of red right there folks (image to you right) is the flower of the Pohutakawa tree, NZ's Christmas tree. And see that beach beyond the flower? That beach (oh, okay, not that particular beach but one fairly similar) is where I'll be the day after New Year. Beaches, sun, sand and Pohutakawa trees are the vital elements of a good, old Kiwi Christmas, which, I know, is inconceivable to all you folk buried deep in the snow.

Well, can I say I'm envious? I'd love a white christmas, I really would. I did live in London for a few years but even then we didn't ever have a truly white Christmas. But then again, there is a certain something to sipping Christmas bubbles on the deck in the sun in your t-shirt and then perhaps going for a post-prandial swim... I guess it's all in what you're used to.

Anyway, I'll be be around until after New Year (still waiting on my character tweaks) and then I'll be up north at the beach where there is NO INTERNET! I do not know how I will cope. I'm hoping Santa will bring me an iPhone for Christmas so I won't be completely cut off...:-)

But the point of this blog post (yes, I do have one) is to wish everyone a very happy Christmas and New Year. Here's lots of lovely Kiwi sun and warmth coming to all those in the cold, and to those in the Southern Hemisphere, let's hope it doesn't get too hot!

Dr Jax Stages An Intervention

There I was, throwing myself dramatically on the floor, crying that I couldn't do it, sounding remarkably like my four year old daughter, when Dr Jax at last arrived home from work. Honestly, I don't think he knew what to make of it. No, that's a lie, he knew exactly. I am the biggest drama queen in the world when it comes to my writing. When it's not going right, NOTHING is right. I can't concentrate on anything, I can't do anything, I am a grumpy, horrible, whiny person. Dr Jax knew immediately what the problem was though and, luckily for myself, and for my CPs, he decided to stage an intervention before I bored them all senseless with endless emails of whiny, moany drivel.

Yup, you guessed it, heroine problems. I had changed her conflict so many times it was just one big mess and I couldn't think my way out of it. It's at times like this when I need a cool head to talk me through it and my husband is just amazing with stuff like that. Ten minutes later, a strong martini in hand, I was finally getting to the root of my problem - at least according to Dr Jax.

My heroines, he said, are too perfect. They have no dark sides. Which is very, very true. Not to mention the fact that they are defined by their conflict - like their personalities and their lives are totally formed by that one event. Argh!

However, it's not all bad. After a long talk, aided by more martini and the wonderful ideas and suggestions from my fabulous (not to mention very patient) CPs, I have finally got an idea for a conflict for my heroine. It's not exaggerated (I hope) and she has a personality outside of this
one conflict. I even managed to give her some weaknesses. Woohoo! She's becoming a person! Now all I need to hope is that the editor agrees with this new idea.

So three cheers for Dr Jax. I told him that he could do a guest spot on my blog and everyone could write in with character questions that he could answer. He told me that finally he knew the real reason he went into psychiatry: to help me write my romance novels. :-)

Anyone else had any breakthroughs this week? Or has it been full-on, kicking and screaming on the floor frustration?

Heroines Behaving Badly

I am going spare trying to figure out the characters of my new submission. The editor has asked me to do character bios of each of them in an effort to get me to focus on characterisation and it's driving me crazy! I think I've got my hero figured out but my heroine refuses to play ball. I have no idea why I can't write her but it's incredibly annoying. Why are women so difficult?? :-)

Anyway, for those of you thinking the editor is gently holding my hand, no she is not. She called my heroine childish and immature, not to mention unnattractive. No words have been minced there. The really irritating thing is that the ed is right. I don't think Cat is like that in the partial but the fact remains that her conflict is only half thought out. Which is my fault.

It wasn't all bad. She liked some of the actions my characters took (which is solely down to Michelle S's expert advice) and she really liked the central theme. Which is why, I'm assuming, she is giving me the chance to do this story but with fully-fledged characters.

So, I have sent her some more ideas about the backgrounds for both characters and she said she'd get back to me with tweaks. Haven't heard yet but since then I've gone through yet another set of ideas for my heroine. I am now officially sick of her.

The problems I'm having though are mainly because of the way I write which is writing my way into my characters. They have a half thought of background when I start but I don't know really what they're all about until the end. And that is not working for me clearly. I need to know all about them from the first page. I need to forget about the external conflict that brings them together and start from a core of internal conflict, building the rest of the character around that. And I need to do that before I start writing because working backwards like this is very, very hard. It's hard because I'm desperate to keep some of the things the editor liked but I'm not sure, given my heroine's new background, whether she would still act in the same way. And if I'm not sure, then she probably wouldn't, which means I'll probably have to change those bits. Changing bits the editor liked is NOT easy but then again, acting unbelievably is one of my heroine's main failings so therefore I have to change them. Argh!

Okay, I'm now officially, officially sick of my heroine and am going to take the day off her. Big hugs to all of you who got the dreaded R from the competition. Remember an R does not mean you or your writing sucks. It just wasn't the right story.

On Contests

I wasn't going to weigh in to the fray with the palaver happening on the I Heart Presents site, but I wanted to say a couple of things in response. No, not controversial stuff, there's enough of that floating around at the moment I 'm thinking, it's just something to think about.

I pretty much just wanted to remind everyone that a contest win doesn't automatically equal publication. Nor does a contest placing. If it did, I'd be published by now. All a contest is, is a faster-than-normal submission process. If you'd worked hard on your chapter and synopsis, and subbed them the normal way, the response you would get would be exactly the same. Some will get requests and some will get rejections.
Oh, but you say, didn't the winners get an editor for a year? That's different from the normal sub process. Well, actually no it's not any different. Because it's been a year since my contest placing and I am still working with an editor. And I was working with an editor before my placing too so me getting runner up in Feel the Heat really had nothing to do with it. It got a manuscript seen faster probably but that's it. They're not going to publish me because I got somewhere in a contest, they're going to publish me because I can write a book they want to publish. I know, it's all very well for me to say that but if you don't take my word for it, take Maisey's. She submitted through the slush, spent a year working with an editor, and sold. That's the prize right there, no contest required.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that you don't need a contest placing to win the prize. If the editors see potential, they'll want to see more of what you have. And people always forget that even when you do get to have that wonderful feedback, it's not the end. No, it's just the beginning of how hard you need to work. Winning an editor for a year, whether through the slush or the contest, means a year of slogging your guts out. And even when you do slog, you may not be published. Because that last part - writing a publishable book - is all dependent on you, your ability to take criticism and your skill as a writer to apply it to your manuscript, not a contest placing.

No part of this process is easy. Contests are great ways to polish up something for a deadline and get a response to a submission quickly. But they are not the only way. Keep submitting. That's all you can do.

Presents Competition - Congrats!

Hey, big huge congrats to the winners of the Presents Writing Competion! To get so far out of so many entries is a huge acheivement. Chocolate martinis and champagne cocktails all round.
Especially to fellow aspirant MH author and MH winner, Gill (AKA Jilly). I've only just met you but your talent is truly inspiring. Can't wait to read the book!

In other positive news, I have heard back from the ed. She wants me to send her detailed character back-stories for Cat and Sean before a partial and a synopsis. So I'm still in the game here! Now this is something I should have done way back when and just didn't because I'm so damn impatient to get to writing the story. No longer!

So this weekend is my time to sort out just who my characters are. I'm going to write detailed backstories for them, why they are the people they are when the story opens. Very excited as this feels like I'm finally getting to the root of my problems with conflict...

More next week!

Romance Writer, Amateur Psychologist

Why psychology? Because I got feedback about my synopsis and, yes, there were problems. Guess where my problems were? Yup, the evil heroine strikes again! Hero had potential, heroine...childish and immature.

Groan! I'll be honest here, I did wonder when I was writing this story, whether her conflict was right. Halfway through the book I was going um...not sure about this...but I persevered hoping it would fix itself. But it didn't. So Jackie's number one rule is going to be: Go with your gut! If it's not working for you then it's not working full stop!

Right, so where to from here? Well, I'm going to go with fixing this one because in spite of evidence to the contrary, I do feel like I'm getting there with fully backgrounding my characters. Kate, for a start, is much more fully realised than Cat is. And that's mainly due to me thinking long and hard about Kate before I started writing. Plus, I like this story.

What I should be doing is taking advice from all you people who do character sketches before writing. Either that or I do what I usually do which is to write my way into my characters, finish the ms, and then write the synopsis. Impatience is my besetting sin and does not help in my writing!

The one thing that does console me is that the editor did tell me that writing romance with psychologically compelling, believable characters is very, very difficult. Hear that everyone? This is HARD stuff we're doing. We have to have strong conflict but it has to be light and flirty. It has to extend to 50k but you can't have any external conflict. It has to be sympathetic but not too specific. It has to have the fantasy factor. These are not easy things to accomplish. In fact, I was having a moan to a good friend of mine who is very, very literary and she said, 'Actually, what you're writing is very difficult isn't it?' And I thought, no kidding! Category romance is a tough beast.

Anyway, the other thing that keeps me going is this: the ed told me that my writing was all there and that once I got the characterisation right, I'll be away.

So, you see, I simply have to keep going. :-)

The Red String Bracelet Or The Problem with Quirks

Thanks everyone for the great input on my last post! Got some great ideas. You rock, did you know that? Anyway, still on the subject of my difficulties with heroines, I had a bit of a brainwave today. It actually happened while I was doing a pilates class (as you do). I realised that in order to do some of the exercises, I was over-compensating for my weak arms by using my shoulders, which are really strong. I know, what's your point Jackie? Well, the point is that I am doing something similiar with my heroines. In order to cover my weak character development, I have been over-relying on quirks to make my heroines different.

Kate is a case in point. She started out a hippy because I didn't really understand conflict at the time and making her a stereotype was an easy way of characterising her. Bad move. And I think that's why I'm finding it difficult to get a handle on her now because once I take away the stereotype, where is my character? In stripping her of her quirks (eco beliefs, nose-ring) I've exposed the fact that she has no real conflict. She's just a cardboard cutout. So I have to go back to basics, dig deep to find out who she is. Build up a real background with real problems.

Once I've got that, I can add those quirks back again - but only if they are true to the person she is now. Because although quirks aren't bad, if you're going to use them there has to be a reason for them. I think I've mentioned this before in other posts but if, for example, you take the time to mention your heroine's love of sparkly red shoes, you should then also explain why she likes them. Is she like Dorothy and they represent escape? And if so, what is she escaping and why?

Kate, for example, has retained one of her old quirks (no, not the nose-ring). She wears a friendship bracelet of red string around one wrist. Now, in the old draft there wasn't any reason for behind this, she wore it because I put it there. In the new draft however, she wears it because her brother gave it to her before he left to go overseas. She hasn't seen him in years and for her, it represents his connection to her. And now, because I've linked it to her conflict, it also represents the family that she once had and loved, and that is slowly slipping away from her. Now, I'm sure Alex will make a comment on this bracelet and perhaps it'll come to mean something for him too. Perhaps, once I write the thing, he'll help Kate to change its meaning so that it doesn't represent what she lost, but what remains strong. Because he has his own lesson to teach her, just as she has something to teach him.

Anyway, all this has been great distraction from the waiting. So, anyone else have a problem with unexplainable quirks?

Difficult Heroines

Right, well, no news for me this week. But I'm good with that. No, really, I am. Patience is a virtue and one I'm slowly learning. Certainly Maisey's 20 month wait for her Call is a fantastic lesson in good things come to those who wait. So I shall continue waiting.

In the meantime, I am wrestling with Kate. She's my hippy heroine who now isn't so much hippy as an architect of eco-friendly houses. And I'm wrestling with her because I am having a few problems getting a handle on her character. Does anyone else have this problem at times? Now she's an architect instead of a protestor, her character has - naturally enough - changed and I can't seem to figure her out. I had to change her from my FTH entry because in that story she had no conflict at all and - I have to admit - did come over as a little bit shrill. And as Alex is, in my updated story, quite a strong alpha, she does have to hold her own against him. So far she's managing to do that but in a quietly strong way, which surprised me because I had imagined her as fiery. But no, apparently not.

One of my problems, see, is that I write myself into my characters. The more of the story I write, the more they reveal themselves. Which is great if it wasn't for my anal-ness with regard to first chapters. I really, really like to have my first chapter as done as it can be before I write the rest of it. It's the set-up for the whole book you see and if it's not working, I can't write the rest. If I have a good first chapter, then the rest of the first draft can be as dirty as it gets, that doesn't matter, just as long as that first part is done. But if I write myself into my characters, I usually don't know much about them in the first chapter so sometimes their character is 'off' and hence the first chapter doesn't go well. You see my conundrum? So with Kate, I'm really finding it difficult to progress the story because I can't get past my first chapter difficulties with her.

However, in the interests of progress and getting words down, I have pushed through my first chapter woes and am writing further on in the hope that Kate will stop being such a changeable little thing and settle down. In fact I often do this too, just push through. Sometimes I'll even skip a scene that isn't working and go on to the next one. This can work well as usually the scene I'll have problems with either turns out to be unnecessary or different in some way that I wasn't aware of until I skipped it.

So what does everyone else do when they have problems with their ms or one of their characters? Long wistful walks in flowing white gowns through fields of sunflowers? Cleaning the shower? Throwing yourself dramatically on the couch and declaring you're a hopeless writer, you'll never get anywhere and you don't know why you bother? *puts up hand*. :-)

This Is Why We Do This - Congrats Maisey!

We do this so that one day we might actually be published authors. Like Maisey Yates. This damn fine woman got the call yesterday and I would just like to sent out a huge...

(no, get your mind out of the gutter)...

WOOHOO!!!!

Presents/Modern's brand new author is not only a very cool person but a great writer too. It's enough to make a girl simply green... ;-)

Well done, Maisey. Can't wait until your book comes out!

Why Do We Do This Again??

I should imagine that I'm not the only aspiring romance author who is feeling sick at this moment in time. Hands up all those who entered the Modern/Modern Heat writing contest! It's a horrible feeling eh? Knowing a decision is being made, one that is all about your hopes and dreams, and knowing that you will have absolutely no control over it. Gah, it's enough to make anyone reach for the bucket.

So why am I sick? Well, I didn't enter the contest but I have heard that the lovely editor who is (un)fortunate enough to read my stuff is getting to my synopsis this week. So every morning I open my email program with huge amounts of trepidation. What I'm hoping for is a 'yes, this might work if you change this, this and this'. What I'm terrified of recieving is 'never on God's green earth would we want to publish this tripe'. Because no matter how good we think our story is, the fact is that we don't know until the editor says yes. I think my story is good, at least I really enjoyed writing it and it was certainly better than the last one. But who knows? There may be some kind of fatal flaw in it that I haven't spotted.

Anyway, the annoying thing is that usually the best way to cope with these sick feelings is to write something but I can't concentrate on writing anything at the moment. Grump. Grump. Perhaps taking Great Uncle Visa out for a little tootle round the shops is in order. Sadly he hasn't recovered from the last pair of NTAI shoes I bought so maybe I'll have to go easy on him.

So, what do other people do to when they don't want to think about what's going down over in Richmond?

New Hero Love

New story love is a special kind of love. So too is new hero love. And I adore my new hero. Or should I say, I adore my new-old hero, cause he's not really new, having made his first appearance in my Feel The Heat entry last year. However, he IS kind of new in that he actually has some internal conflict. Plus I've also given him a sympathetic in with the heroine, because in his first incarnation, apart from his astoninishingly good looks, he didn't have anything that she could admire about him. Or even like. And let's face it, if your h&h are going to be antagonistic, there has to be something there that each finds admirable about the other otherwise your love story isn't going to be very believable.

It's all about the sympathy factor. Is your character sympathetic? This is doubly important (I think) when you've got a rude hero. And my hero is one of those lazy, arrogant, sarcastic types because, sad to say, I really like those kind of heroes. Mostly because their downfall into love is so delicious...
Anyway, I think this touches on one of the seven sins that I Heart Presents listed about the comp entries - a hero who gets irrationally cross and treats everyone like dirt. This isn't alpha. This is just being an a*hole. So how to stop your sarcastic hero from coming across as a guy you'd just want to kick? Give him motivation. Why is he being so rude? Is he sick? Tired? Worried about something else? Angry? And if he's angry, why is he angry?
For dear Alex, his reason for being an ass is that he's worried about his father and having to deal with a bunch of protestors who are bothering him with what he thinks of as inconsequential problems is the last thing he wants to think about. Especially as one of the protestors is very, very attractive.
True, this isn't an excuse for his rudeness but at least there is a reason behind it. And the reason is the 'in' with the heroine because when Kate discovers it, she is immediately sympathetic. Family is important to her and she finds his concern for his father attractive.

I should confess also that the other reason I love sarcastic heroes is because they do make the dialogue fun to write. Especially when you pair them with an equally quick heroine. Oooh, yum, yum. I love my dialogue - can you tell?
So what's your favourite type of hero then? Do you like yours with lashings of sarcasm? Or are you more into the strong, silent type?

All Dressed Up

Okay, well, the partial is done. Its got its party dress on, hair has been styled, the makeup done. Now all it's waiting for is to be asked out. Don't want it to be a wallflower...

In other romantic news, the darling Dr Jax took me for a suprise wedding anniversary weekend to Waiheke Island, one of the islands in Auckland's gulf harbour. A kid free weekend and it was bliss!
Not to mention giving me a few ideas for my next wip. Yes, a writer's imagination is always working.

This wip is the infamous Kate and Alex story and I finally, finally think I've got the conflict and plot exactly as they should be (at least I think so). Waiheke is home to lots of hippy-type people as well as very rich-type people. So I can see the Modern Heat potential. Lots of beautiful vineyards, lots of five star resorts, lots of tie-dye and dream catchers. The perfect place for the child of hippy parents to take on a rich and unscrupulous property developer...

Now I've got a handle on the old action/reaction and the KISS principle with regard to conflict, I think I could make this one work. Now what I really need to concentrate on is NOT adding additional strands to my conflict but that's a whole other story...

Wherefore Art Thou Tension?

I have just realised why I've been unhappy with the last third of my wip and why the black moment feels like it comes out of the blue - there is no tension. My characters are having a lovely time now they've fallen into bed but where is the 'OMG it's all going to end in tears I just know it!' feeling? Where is the dark cloud that is rapidly lowering on the horizon? Gone, that's what.
Michelle Styles' comment on my last post about kitchens was incredibly prescient as it turns out because yes, I have lost the tension. With every scene the tension should wind tighter not release like a tightrope snapping under a heavy weight!

The good thing is that I know why my tension has snapped. It's because I've lost focus of the essential conflict - again! I got sidetracked by the reasons they were falling for each other and though that's important, it's not as important as the all reasons they shouldn't! And not just the 'I must not fall in love' but the 'why I must not fall in love'.
Not to mention the fact that I haven't dug as deeply into my conflict as I need to. My hero has been bringing up his much younger sister for the last ten years and though she's now at university, he is still finding it difficult to let her go. Why? What's he afraid of? And what does this mean for my heroine? And speaking of her, she is still trying to escape her over-protective parents. Why? What's she really afraid of and what does this mean for the hero?

So, have hauled the sorry mess back into line again by putting their essential conflict back into their scenes together. Building up that tension so that when the black moment arrives, it'll be so dark that they will be absolutely unable to see their way out of it.

I just hope to God I can! :-)

Everyone's Always in the Kitchen At Parties

Okay, so not just parties. In the process of editing and I've discovered that in every one of my mss there is always a scene where one or the other of the characters is in the kitchen making coffee. I have no idea why. No, actually, I do: it's the old 'let's have a conversation about our conflict' kind of stuff and so they have to be doing something while they're having this conversation. But for some reason these scenes are always in the kitchen and during the course of it one of the characters is making a hot drink. But why? Why the kitchen? Why coffee and not tea? Why a hot drink? Why not make food instead?

It's probably a custom thing. Whenever my h & h eventually get to go to one another's houses, offering a hot drink is the socially done thing. And since I don't drink tea, it's usually coffee. Plus, coffee gives the character something to do, grinding beans etc (especially the hero - coffee is a more manly type of drink, especially when he gets to fiddle with a gleaming, stainless steel espresso machine. Ha ha.) . But still, it's weird. This wip for example, the heroine is staying with the hero and so what does he do as soon as she arrives? Heads straight to the kitchen and goes to make coffee! Why doesn't he whip her up a souffle or something?

I really should break out and do something more radical with my dialogue scenes. At our last conference, I went to a workshop about setting scenes and about how lots of people seemed to set their dialogue in kitchens. It was suggested to try another location for interest's sake. Such as a wind tunnel. Or a mountain side. Or a boat. The problem I have with that is that kitchens/restaurants etc are the places where people normally have conversations like this. Especially deep and meaningful ones. And if you're writing Modern Heat most of the time your characters won't be in wind tunnels or mountain sides, and if they are, they're probably doing much more important stuff than talking about their conflict!

Seriously though, I should be a bit different with my scene setting. What about everyone else? What's the most unusual location you've set a scene in?

Finished

Big woots all round - I finished my story! Yep, now have 48k of...dross probably. :-) Got bogged down in the last third and I'm hoping it's not going to be as bad as I think. Dr Jax says I'm over-thinking the conflict. He's probably right. But won't know until I see what I've written.

One thing's for sure, already stuff has changed from the synopsis. Not the big things but some of the small plot points. Just goes to show how things can change once you've completed a manuscript. I guess that's why everyone says to sub the partial only once you've finished writing the whole thing. Not that I've ever done that! Maybe that's why I haven't had anything accepted yet! :-)

Anyway, the most certain thing about it is that I am going to have to do a lot of editing. If the initial draft is 48k it means that the polished ms will almost certainly be longer. Especially since I only kind of sketched the ending. Lots of work. Maybe I'll be so busy with editing it that I won't stress about the synopsis currently living in London. And considering the number of entries for the Presents competition, I suspect it will be living there for some time to come.

In the meantime, I have joined the Romance Writers of Australia in the hope of entering this baby into the Emerald Award. I know, I kind of went off contests but they sure give you something to do while you wait. Am even considering this one for the RWNZ Clendon award too.

Right, that's the end of my insights for the day. Having one's four year old daughter wake up in the middle of the night twice is not conduicive to thinking about writing sadly. What's everyone else up to?

New Publishing Opportunity

Harlequin have asked me to pass on a new publishing opportunity - they are going digital!

Carina Press will be launched in the summer of 2010 and they are looking for new authors in all sorts of genres. Submissions are open right now and you can get the details here:

Carina Press

Could be good you reckon?

Oh and if you want to hear some great editorial advice, check out Maisey's blog. She's discussing stuff she got her revision letters and that kind of comment, well, it's gold dust.

The Dangers of Self Awareness

It's been a bit of a full on weekend. Firstly it was my daughter's fourth birthday, secondly I am in the middle of Nano-ing, and thirdly I twisted my ankle right at the crucial moment of getting my daughter to come to see her birthday cake! Collapsing on the couch in a moment of extreme agony, the rest of my family thought I was having a wee nap and laughed. It was only when I went green that they suspected it wasn't just tiredness that had me stretched full length on the couch.

Anyway, trying to do the first two with the third has been a bit of a mission. Especially since all I wanted to do was sit at my desk and write my ms - apparently not a good thing with a twisted ankle that should be kept elevated.

However, I have been making respectable progress. I will be finishing it this week which will be great. The only problem with writing a novel in about a week and a half is that no doubt I'll need to spend a month editing the thing! I'm almost afraid to read what I've written - it'll be dreck I'm sure of it.

And it hasn't been all all plain sailing with the writing either. I have a big problem in that I tend to make my h&h too self aware too early. In fact I didn't even realise this was, in fact, what I was doing until Dr Jax rolled his eyes and pointed it out to me. The issue with making them self aware - ie being in love - is that if you do it too early, you run into the problem where it's not the conflict keeping them apart so much as the being in love and not wanting to be. So the focus changes from the conflict - eg, my heroine not wanting to be protected - to her not wanting to be in love. Same with the hero. He fell in love too early and so his angst stems from not wanting to be in love rather than wanting to hold on to someone who doesn't want to be held.

Tricky eh? It's my own fault really. I love angst which is why I make them self aware - the anguish of loving someone but not wanting to! O the pain! But if you have two people loving each other and yet not wanting to be in love, how does this resolve the conflict? All there is angst with nothing really progressing. Which is why I felt I was writing the same thing over and over, having my heroine constantly go over the reasons why she doesn't want to fall in love and yet nothing really happening with her real conflict.

But then, how do I include the angst and tension? You're supposed to have it right? Which is when Dr Jax pointed out that the conflict provides the tension not the 'I'm so in love and yet I can't be' kind of thing. Another Aha moment for me. So I've pulled back on the awareness, let the conflict provide the tension, and my characters will not be falling in love until right near the end. That'll teach 'em.

Caveat

I'm feeling a bit bad here. I'm really liking that people who read this blog get something from it to help in their writing, but please know that this is only my journey. And I am still travelling on it, nowhere near my destination yet. Which means that some of this stuff on here may be wrong. So please take my little lightbulb moments with a grain of salt. And let me know if I've made a mistake somewhere!

Re the whole conflict thing, when I said that conflict doesn't need to be bad, I did mean that. But only because I always thought it had to be some terrible tragedy. So it was kind of interesting to figure out that it didn't need to be. That I didn't have to pile on dead fiances/wives/family/kids. However, that doesn't mean that tragedy can't be good conflict because obviously it can. It can be very, very strong. Now, the hero I talked about in the last post, whom I gave a dead fiance to, the only reason that was him living in the past was because there wasn't anything about the heroine that tapped into my hero's conflict. Perhaps if my heroine had sworn never to play second fiddle to anyone again, that would have been better. Or if she'd decided that her next relationship would mean marriage or nothing.
Even this current WIP, my hero has had tragedy in his life. He lost his parents in an accident and so had to look after his much younger sister, but his conflict isn't to do with grief about his parents (though obviously it's in there). It's to do with responsbility and trying to do what's best for people, even though they may not agree. So his conflict becomes a culmination of his experience - looking after his sister, taking over his father's company, etc, etc, rather than a single moment of loss. And it's conflict because my heroine does NOT want someone looking after her.

But again, that's not to say that those moments of loss aren't hugely terrible and don't make good conflict. It's just you can't take them in isolation from the rest of a person's life. My last sub was an excellent example of doing just that - my heroine lost her father in an accident (yes, I have a terrible tendency to kill off my character's parents!) and that defined her character completely. It was like she'd had no life since her father died, which is not the case in real life because people move on after a tragedy (just ignore the fact that some people don't!). They don't forget, obviously, and it marks them, but it was like my heroine was stuck in some kind of time warp. And it didn't help that I'd exaggerated her living safe ways. Not good for an aspirational heroine who was supposed to be a lawyer!

So, anyway, that's my thoughts on this irritating conflict business. Really, talking about...say shoes for example is far less annoying. Or favourite books. And speaking of which, I bought Natalie Anderson's Hot Boss, Boardroom Mistress on ebook a couple of days ago and if you're looking for a sizzling reunion story then baby, you've found it!

Oh and for those of you worried about having too much sex without emotion in their stories (Jackie raises hand) here's is a great post by Sam Hunter, a Blaze author, about sexual motivation. Certainly made me think.

Conflict: Past vs Present

So, here I am in waiting no-man's-land. I am forging ahead with my wip regardless though. Even if they don't want it, it's great practise and I have to say, I'm quite enjoying writing it. I even like my heroine for a change! :-)

Anyway, I wanted to talk about a comment Janet left on my blog about conflict and how it happens in the present. I think I mentioned in the last post but I thought I'd expand a bit here. I never really got this to be honest, I mean, come on, of course conflict happens in the present. And in the past too right?

Well yes. And no. The conflict that we deal with in our stories may have been seeded in the past, but it happens only in the present. For example, the hero of my current wip has been looking after his sister for the past 12 years (this is the seed of his conflict). He's the protective sort and has been doing this quite happily with no problems. He's not conflicted about his need to protect at all.
Until he meets my heroine. Why? Because she does NOT want to be protected. So here he is, calmly going about his protective business which, he assumes, the heroine will naturally see eye to eye with since no one else has called him on this behaviour before (apart fom his sister but that's different 'cause she's his sister right?). But lo and behold, the heroine says 'I don't need protecting buddy so back off.' So instantly we have conflict. And it's happening in the present. Yes, the basis for it is the fact that he's been looking after his sister for years, but it's never been a problem for him until now.
Same with my heroine. She's escaping over-protective parents and wants to do things for herself. Not a problem, no conflict - until she meets my protective hero. And then it's conflict all the way baby!

Now, you could compare this to an earlier incarnation of this story where I (overdosing on internal conflict!) gave my hero a dead fiance. This was fine but when he met the heroine, there wasn't anything other than a dead fiance to hold him back from a relationship with her. There was nothing about the heroine in particular that made him feel conflicted - other than the fact that she was a woman and he was wary of loving again! :-) Thus, when they met, there wasn't much in the way of conflict happening - all his conflict was in the past. Does that make sense?

Anyway, that's my understanding of it and no doubt there's heaps more still learn about this angle. Anyone got any other thoughts? Might as well think about that rather than thinking about our subs/competition entries huh? ;-

Synopsis Sent

After two weeks of fiddling and rewriting, synopsis version 6 is on its way. Thanks to the wonderful Michelle Styles, I now have a story with potential, rather than severe flaws. Of course the editors at Mills and Boon may not agree but even if they don't, I have learned SO much about conflict and action/reaction in the course of the past two weeks that the next sub will be even better. And I like my story a whole lot more than the last one which is a good sign I hope.

So what have I learned?

1. The conflict and thus the story plays out in the action and reaction of the characters.
2. The conflict happens in the present.
3. Internal conflict need not be based on tragedy.
4. Internal conflict can be simple.
5. That action is not talking. Talking is talking.
6. That rewriting one's synopsis completely six times can be a good thing.
7. That one can have too many dinners in one's synopsis.
8. That chocolate is a vital ingredient to synopsis writing.
9. That banging one's head on the table after version 4 hurts.
10. That you still feel sick when you press send no matter how many times you have subbed.

Right, so now all I need to do is write the thing! And thanks to Janette, I have a title: The Art of Attraction. Not a millionaire or a defiant mistress in sight.

Now, on with the NTAI.

Another Minor Epiphany

Yes, I know, two in one week is ridiculous but after Friday's lightbulb moment, I kind of had another. I wanted to use the whole action/reaction/consequence thing on my other WIPs but first I had to really concentrate on the essential conflict of the h&h. And it was as I was doing this that I had another realisation (cue drum roll, please):

Conflict doesn't necessarily need to be based on bad things happening in the past!

Cool eh? Now, you guys may already know this and be thinking, 'yeah, duh!' but up till this point I have been giving my characters all manner of dead families/fiancees/babies or whatever tragedy is popular right now, purely so they would not want a relationship. The thing I suddenly got was that the point is not that the h&h don't want a relationship at all, they just don't want a relationship with a particular person! Why don't they? Because that person threatens everything they believe up till that point in time. And it's only when they come into contact with that person, that there is conflict. Conflict, as Michelle is always telling me, happens in the present not the past.

Clear as mud? For example, I've finally figured out the essential conflict of my Kate and Alex story: for Alex, home is where the heart is. For Kate heart is where the home is. Neither of them have any problem with this UNTIL they meet. And as soon as they meet, there is conflict because each challenges the other. In order to resolve this, Alex must learn that having roots isn't a bad thing and Kate must learn that home isn't necessarily embodied in one place.
Now, I had Alex having lost a fiancee etc, but really, in order for him to believe that home is where the heart is, I don't need any of that. Maybe just the fact that he moved around a lot as a kid is enough. And maybe he was quite happy with this state of affairs. But it's only when he comes into contact with Kate that he feels threatened about it. And voila, instant conflict.

So all in all I feel rather pleased with myself about this. Especially as I have now got real and believable conflicts for all my WIPs. Now all I have to do is plan the stories using action/reaction/consequence, completely rewrite all of them, and Robert's your father's brother. ;-)

Oh yeah, and I signed up for NaNo too. Need to write my next sub, rather imaginatively titled Cat and Sean. Anyone else?

A Minor Epiphany

After a week of banging my head against a brick wall with this new synopsis I have finally - with the help of the perspicacious Dr Jax and the wonderful Michelle Styles - figured out my problem. I simply could NOT get my characters to act without exaggerating my conflicts. And I had to exaggerate the conflicts in order to give them motivation to act. I was STILL getting them to act in the way I wanted them to.

The reason is that they were still passive. They were not taking action. And the reason for that is I have been thinking about my stories in terms of scenes. I think, okay, need a love scene, put one in here. What about a 'save the cat' moment here. And black moment here. And when I think about the scenes I want, I try and move my characters towards the scenes, which is NOT letting them act.

It's like a play. The play opens with the characters on stage. They do the scene, the scene ends, the stage goes dark. Then the next scene opens. How have the characters got there? Where are they going? The scene ends, the stage goes dark. What happens next? We don't know and neither do I!

I have been treating my stories like this play, opening with a scene, then jumping to the next scene etc, etc. Episodic in other words. Great for a play, not so great for a story.

So I've cut it right back. Concentrating on the most essential conflict - my hero wants to control and so has to learn to let people go, my heroine needs freedom but has to learn it's okay to lean on someone. So what happens when a guy like this meets a woman like this? Forget flirtation scenes, think about action. The external conflict puts him in the situation of having to look after her so what does he do? He's all about control so says she has to come with him. Her reaction? She's all about freedom so get lost buster. What is the consequence? Does he force her to go? And if so, what action does she take in response? And right there is where the conflict is driving the story through the actions of the characters. No need for exaggeration because their reactions are based on their essential conflict. Who knows when they'll need a love scene - I'm not sure - but it will be because one of them makes a decision and the consequence of that is making love.

Dunno if this makes sense to everyone or if everyone is goin 'well, duh, I already knew that!'. But this is certainly why I have been having so many problems with conflict. I have already got a plan for the new story based entirely on action, reaction and consequence. Hopefully it'll make a good synopsis but if not, it's certainly been a HUGE learning curve to take!

The Rebound Submission

Yes, that's exactly what my rejected sub was. I had the rejection on the revised full and then, so desperate to submit again was I, that I quickly fiddled with a new story and sent it away without thinking it through properly. Or rather, I over-thought it. I was trying so hard to get it right that in the end I got nothing right, even the stuff I normally do well.

So it's back to the drawing board. Somehow I've now managed to overboard with internal conflict and have to bring it back to the middle ground. Hard? You betcha. But I have been slowly learning even more. Especially about the dangers of too much sex in Modern Heat! Is that even possible? Oh yeah! I tried to do a one night stand story but even as I was writing it, I found myself inventing ways to get my heroine to go through with it. And that should have been my first indication that all was not right in the world of my characters. Again I was trying to make my heroine do something she actually wouldn't by adding all this stuff to make her to do it! Argh! In the end it wasn't convincing and to add insult to injury, the driving force behind the one night stand was only sexual tension. There was not enough conflict! Apparently the sex arises from the emotional conflict, NOT the other way round!

So many things to keep in mind. But this time I am going to make sure I get it right. I am not going to panic-sub. I am going to spend time really thinking through my new synopsis. And hey, I'm already doing better with that on the sex front - so busy working out the emotional conflict between my h&h, that I forgot to put in a love scene!

Romance Writing is Not for Sissies

Okay, as someone told me on the RWNZ email loop today, congratulations on my rejection because it means I'm a writer. And she's right. I can no longer pretend that it's a little something I do in my spare time, that it's a sideline to my real life, that it's my hobby, that it doesn't matter. Because it does matter. I was gutted yesterday, really and truly gutted. I told myself I may as well give up. But you know what? Even as I was telling myself that, I was thinking about the story I'm currently writing and how I needed to adjust the internal conflict a bit more now!

A rejection stinks. It's not easy and it won't get any easier. There will, no doubt, be more rejections to come. You can't control the rejections but, to paraphrase Michelle Styles' wise words, what you can control is your response to them. Yesterday I wallowed completely and utterly, allowed myself to think about giving up, allowed myself to feel I was hopeless and I'd never do it. But now I am done with wallowing. Time for my professional response which is: keep writing. Work on that next submission. Make it the best. Take the hurt and turn it into determination.

I want to say though that part of dealing with rejection is also sharing the pain of it with others who understand and you all who have read this blog do understand. And the support and faith you have given me is amazing. I am so lucky to be part of this community. So huge thanks for all the comments and encouragement from yesterday - it really got me through the worst of it.

And, since I am a writer, I have advice for other writers who want to do this, who are lurking and thinking of submitting: to paraphrase my old boss, romance writing is not for sissies. It's a hard road and a long one. You may take a step forward, only to fall back again. But if you love writing, if you can't NOT write, then don't let the fear of rejection hold you back. Yes, you will get rejected. Yes, it will hurt. But you will not be published if you don't submit, if you don't keep writing, if you give up.

Right, since I am very good at NOT taking my own advice when it comes to my writing, I need to sit down and take a good look at my next submission!

Oh and Aideen? No, you didn't see the words 'give up' on my blog. They weren't there. You must have mistaken them for "NOT giving up" :-)

Missed Again

Well guys, I heard from Anna and no, they didn't want it. As you can imagine, I'm very disappointed. All her comments were right on the money but it's the usual story - you submit something and only after it's gone do you learn more and realise what you should have done.

So, having gone from nearly there to missing entirely, I feel a bit like I've taken the wrong road somewhere and ended up in a dead end. Do I actually know what I'm doing? Maybe I don't. I certainly don't feel qualified at giving advice to people - not that I ever really did I have to say.

Oh well, I guess the only way to go on from this is to keep going even though part of me just wants to give up.

A Riddle Inside A Mystery Wrapped In An Enigma

No, I'm not talking about Russia (thanks Winston Churchill), I'm talking about the wretchedness that is internal conflict. As you know (or should know by now!) internal conflict is where Modern Heat/Modern is at and you'd think, after a year of learning about this, I would have finally figured it out.

Nup.

Witness my Kate'n'Alex story. I was writing happily away (the aftermath of a love scene, hot), my conflict sorted, getting into his introspection about how he cannot possibly want a relationship and then I come up, slap bang against the dreaded 'why'. Okay, says I, he doesn't want a relationship because he doesn't like being tied down. Why? Because his family moved around a lot and he learned never to commit to anything or anyone because he knew he'd have to leave again. Yes, but that's what he did as a kid - why does he continue this behaviour as an adult? Um...because he just wants to??

Grrrr. See what I mean? It's all very well having angsty childhood stuff happening, but there has to be a reason for the character to keep acting that way as an adult. Which brings me to finally understanding why a parent cannot be the reason for someone's internal conflict (yes, I'm slow). A parent can add to it, deepen it, but as an adult, would the character really continue to act the way they had as a child? Especially an alpha male?

So, for Alex, I have to have some reason why he continues to believe the lessons he learned in his childhood. Did he ever try thinking differently? What happened when he did?
I have another hero too who I thought had his conflict sorted. But no. He had a difficult childhood and had issues with responsibility, but again, the difficult childhood seems to be the excuse to for him to continue acting the same way as an adult. Again, I have to ask myself, did he ever try to rise above it? Did he succeed or fail? Why did he fail and how did he feel about his failure?

Argh! Seems you can never stop learning in this business...

In the meantime, after a depressed weekend where my writing and everything about it sucked, I succumbed and bought some NTAI shoes. Wedges as you can see since I cannot wear heels without seriously damaging my feet.
Yes, they were ridiculously expensive. Yes, they are totally impractical. Yes, they made me stop thinking about my sub for, oh, about five minutes. :-)

So, anyone else got a handle on internal conflict? What about shoes?

Attraction

Following Heidi's inspirational video (lord the Modern Heat authors know what they're doing if this is their inspiration!) , I thought I might put one up of my own. I keep seeing this on TV and every time I see it I think, 'yes, that's what the attraction between the h&h has to be like!'.

Except of course, the end of this video isn't the way I'd personally end this particular scene, if you know what I mean. ;-)

Oh and Kelly and Heidi's new books? Three words: Fab. U. Lous. Heroes to die for. Yummmo.

Ten Fun Ways to NOT Win the Harlequin Presents Writing Competition

If you have your heart set on NOT winning the Harlequin Presents contest, here are some (slightly tongue-in-cheek) ways to achieve this.

1. Have no internal conflict.
That doesn't mean car chases and villains. Internal conflict is what keeps your h&h from their HEA if they met in bar one night. And it can't be just because he's a Montague and she's a Capulet - that's external conflict people. If you have to introduce a scheming mother-in-law to keep them apart then your conflict isn't strong enough.

2. Have your hero be the shy, easy-going type.
Sorry guys, he may be sweet but that ain't alpha. And alpha is what goes in Presents/Modern.

3. Have as many sub-characters as possible.
You love the heroine's best friend, her wise-cracking husband and their three adorable children. But devoting a whole chapter to them isn't a good idea.

4. Include vampires and werewolves.
I know, you really liked Twilight, but paranormal isn't where Modern/Modern Heat is at, even if you think it should be. Remember the guidelines.

5. Force your characters to act the way you want them to for the purposes of the plot.
I've been there and it ain't pretty. You may want your hero to eat some bad cheese so that he gets sick and the heroine has to look after him, but you do have to ask yourself: does he even like cheese? And if not, why not? These are character driven which means you let the characters act they way they want. So go on, let them have their head!

6. Have things happen to your characters rather than have your characters make decisions and act on them.
A fire might make your hero rescue the heroine after their black moment but what would have happened if there hadn't been a fire? Would he have made up with her anyway? What decision would he have made if you hadn't cruelly sent him into the fire? Again, character driven.

7. Have your hero enter the story in chapter 2.
If that's the case, then shouldn't that be chapter 1? Don't make us wait! He's the reason we're reading it - at least he's the reason I'm reading it.

8. Make your characters act in seemingly random ways.
Such as your heroine suddenly kissing the hero whereas up till now, she hates his guts. Where is her motivation? Why would she do that?

9. Have either or both of your h&h be drug addicted alcoholics.
This may provide heaps of conflict but not much in the way of sympathy. Your h&h must be sympathetic and though drug addiction and alcoholism are real issues, they're probably a little too real for category romance.

10. And most important, you definitely won't win if you don't enter. :-)

Good luck!

Why I Like Ebooks

Because I am extremely, extremely impatient and downloading an ebook is instant. No getting into the car and driving to the bookshop, no feeling annoyed because they don't have the book you want, no getting back into the car and driving to another bookshop, no waiting in a queue at the fourth bookshop where you finally found the book and need to buy it, and no having to haul said book around in your bag for days afterwards because you can't put it down (thank you Wolf Hall).

Okay, the down sides are irritating formatting and licensing which means that if you want to put it on another PC, it's difficult to transfer, reading on a PC screen (which I have got used to), and not being able to read it in the bath. It's that last one which is the biggie for me because I particularly like reading in the bath. If they ever invent an ebook reader than doesn't mind water, I'm an instant buyer.

And the other reason I like ebooks is that I can get my Modern Heat fix a month early! Woohoo! Now, I like all the Modern Heat authors, they rock, but two of my particular favourites are available for download right now - Heidi Rice and Kelly Hunter have two books out this month on the Mills and Boon site and I am happy, happy, happy. I'm going to be a shameless fan girl here and say that I love Heidi's deliciously strong heroes like I love chocolate, and I love Kelly's way with dialogue like I love chocolate martinis. Yummo. Oh, and I've been hanging out for these two stories for ages...

So I'm planning a happy evening downloading and curling up in front of my laptop. What else is everyone doing this evening (or day, depending on your time zone)?