Hmmm, despite my happy 'I love rejections' post, the crows of doubt have come to roost again. Par for the course. No surprises there. To be honest, the constant ups and downs are very tiring. It does tend to be my personality (hello! Gemini!) but I have been kind of thinking, 'do I need stress like this in my life?'. At the very beginning of the year I did tell my husband that I wished I'd never started submitting. That the whole rollercoaster ride was getting a bit much for me.
Then again, I guess that's the hazard when you go after your dreams. It's going to be tough and disappointing, and you will wonder why on earth you thought it was a good idea. Especially when your goal is just as far off as it ever was.
Anyway, this is not a play for sympathy or anything, just a little vent. Sunday morning musings. I am trying to resist the urge to reread my partial, just to make sure I'm as happy with it now as I was when I sent it off but that way lies madness. I have finished the full and the basic conflict seemed to hang together okay which is a good sign but you just never know.
Oh well, will stop moaning. How's everyone else doing? What do you do when the rollercoaster gets too much for you?
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Rejections
No, I haven't had my partial rejected. I really, really hope it won't be but nothing is ever certain when it comes to publishing. However, if it does get the big ole R, I hope people will remind me of this post because I'm currently trying to get my head around loving my rejections.
This is something I do when the wait is getting to me and I'm feeling down about my writing, and wishing I'd known more with the manuscript that was so nearly there but didn't end up making it.
Why? Surely there's nothing happy making about a rejection? Actually, the first rejection I got was happy making and started me on the road to taking my writing seriously. It was from the Instant Seduction Contest and the wonderful editor told me I had potential, that my voice was Modern Heat, and that though they didn't want to see any more of my contest entry (just as well since I hadn't written it), they'd be happy to look at anything else I had. Well, I was over the moon! Yes, I had potential! I expected to hear nothing at all from this contest and I was so thrilled. So off I sent my next partial.
Along come rejection number 2. I was unsurprised since I'd already by that time (having actually read some Modern Heats!) figured out it wasn't a goer. But still, they told me what was wrong with it and they wanted more. So off I sent another partial, while at the same time, entering the Feel the Heat contest. This was where things got serious. I got more feedback from FTH. I began to learn about internal conflict. Still hadn't got it though, my entry was rejected (rejection number 3). But they saw potential in the other partial that I'd send before the contest. I was asked for the full.
So I sent away my first full and back it came with revisions. My heroine needed conflict. I was learning, but I struggled with that. It was so hard. I hadn't learned that rewriting needed to be done, that adding conflict would change the character, that once you change the character, the plot might change too. And proper conflict still eluded me. I still didn't understand. I got a second lot of revisions but the conflict jigsaw still wasn't complete. I still didn't get it.
Rejection number 4 was very hard. The ms was so nearly there but I didn't have the knowledge I needed to make it work and the editors knew it. But now I could see why it hadn't worked. It was becoming clearer. Thinking I had it, I dived into another partial. Yes, surely I had the conflict now. But I was still thinking of the conflict as a thing separate from my characters. I wasn't looking at my characters as whole people, just as receptacles for the conflict I'd thought up.
So back came rejection number 5. Even harder than rejection number 4 in many ways. But the one thing about it was that finally I was beginning to see my problem. And it made me very determined to learn how to fix it. With rejection number 5 also came advice from Michelle Styles about synopses and about the actions and reactions characters take. Another piece of the jigsaw fell into place.
This time I sent off just a synopsis, after much hard work. Didn't get a rejection this time but a warning - think about your characters. You are not telling the story of a particular conflict, you are telling the story of two people. So who are these people? Why are they the way they are? Why are we even interested? And more light dawned. Conflict and character suddenly became much clearer. I felt I'd taken another big step forward. So finally I wrote the partial and sent it off.
I'd love to end this post with a full request but I can't since I don't know yet. However this time I'm taking nothing for granted. I may still be missing a part of the jigsaw, one I can't see yet. But one thing I'm sure of, if that very first ms had been accepted, I would be struggling to write a second. I have learned SO much in the past year though the rejections I've had that I truly don't know if I would have had a second accepted. The rejections have been horrible, gut-wrenching and depressing. But they've also been amazingly helpful, encouraging and focussing, and I would not have learned all that I have if I hadn't had them.
Of course if this partial is rejected, I will give up. Okay? Cause one can only love rejections so much. ;-)
(Yes. I'm kidding. So far).
This is something I do when the wait is getting to me and I'm feeling down about my writing, and wishing I'd known more with the manuscript that was so nearly there but didn't end up making it.
Why? Surely there's nothing happy making about a rejection? Actually, the first rejection I got was happy making and started me on the road to taking my writing seriously. It was from the Instant Seduction Contest and the wonderful editor told me I had potential, that my voice was Modern Heat, and that though they didn't want to see any more of my contest entry (just as well since I hadn't written it), they'd be happy to look at anything else I had. Well, I was over the moon! Yes, I had potential! I expected to hear nothing at all from this contest and I was so thrilled. So off I sent my next partial.
Along come rejection number 2. I was unsurprised since I'd already by that time (having actually read some Modern Heats!) figured out it wasn't a goer. But still, they told me what was wrong with it and they wanted more. So off I sent another partial, while at the same time, entering the Feel the Heat contest. This was where things got serious. I got more feedback from FTH. I began to learn about internal conflict. Still hadn't got it though, my entry was rejected (rejection number 3). But they saw potential in the other partial that I'd send before the contest. I was asked for the full.
So I sent away my first full and back it came with revisions. My heroine needed conflict. I was learning, but I struggled with that. It was so hard. I hadn't learned that rewriting needed to be done, that adding conflict would change the character, that once you change the character, the plot might change too. And proper conflict still eluded me. I still didn't understand. I got a second lot of revisions but the conflict jigsaw still wasn't complete. I still didn't get it.
Rejection number 4 was very hard. The ms was so nearly there but I didn't have the knowledge I needed to make it work and the editors knew it. But now I could see why it hadn't worked. It was becoming clearer. Thinking I had it, I dived into another partial. Yes, surely I had the conflict now. But I was still thinking of the conflict as a thing separate from my characters. I wasn't looking at my characters as whole people, just as receptacles for the conflict I'd thought up.
So back came rejection number 5. Even harder than rejection number 4 in many ways. But the one thing about it was that finally I was beginning to see my problem. And it made me very determined to learn how to fix it. With rejection number 5 also came advice from Michelle Styles about synopses and about the actions and reactions characters take. Another piece of the jigsaw fell into place.
This time I sent off just a synopsis, after much hard work. Didn't get a rejection this time but a warning - think about your characters. You are not telling the story of a particular conflict, you are telling the story of two people. So who are these people? Why are they the way they are? Why are we even interested? And more light dawned. Conflict and character suddenly became much clearer. I felt I'd taken another big step forward. So finally I wrote the partial and sent it off.
I'd love to end this post with a full request but I can't since I don't know yet. However this time I'm taking nothing for granted. I may still be missing a part of the jigsaw, one I can't see yet. But one thing I'm sure of, if that very first ms had been accepted, I would be struggling to write a second. I have learned SO much in the past year though the rejections I've had that I truly don't know if I would have had a second accepted. The rejections have been horrible, gut-wrenching and depressing. But they've also been amazingly helpful, encouraging and focussing, and I would not have learned all that I have if I hadn't had them.
Of course if this partial is rejected, I will give up. Okay? Cause one can only love rejections so much. ;-)
(Yes. I'm kidding. So far).
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Putting the E Back Into Sex
The E is the emotion I'm talking about, not some...um...other E. Ahem, moving right along, MH is a very sexy line. Lots of opportunities for action. And personally I really like writing a good love scene. I tend to put a lot of sensuality in mine to really build it up. I've been told by the ed I write a good one too (blows own trumpet here 'cause someone's got to!) which is pleasing.
So when I was told the emphasis was too heavy on the sex in the last reject, I was puzzled.
Hey, I thought. Whaddya expect? It was a once night stand, ergo, sex. Anyway, you liked the writing, so what was wrong with it? Too much heat? Or didn't the one nighter work out? Did they get together too quickly? What? What exactly did you mean by 'too much emphasis on sex'??
The problem, gentle reader, has only now sunk in. Having borrowed Maisey's editor decoder ring, I went back over the rejection letter and there it was in black and white - there was no emotion in the scene. What? No emotion? There was plenty! They enjoyed themselves didn't they? Oh sure, but we're not just talking pleasure here, we're talking emotion that is related to the conflict. As Michelle S told me, every scene has to forward the conflict on some level, and that includes the love scenes. So I quickly looked at the rough draft of my Cat/Sean ms to see what I'd done with the love scene. I'd really gone to town with it and it was pretty sexy but sure enough, I'd made the same mistake. No conflict!
Doh!
Glad I picked that one up huh? So how to put conflict in a love scene? Pretty much the same as you do with every scene. What's their conflict? How does that come out during love making? What kind of action would the conflict impel them to take and what would the response be and why? So I've got a guy who likes control with a woman who threatens it. And a spontaneous, impulsive woman who wants an emotional connection with a guy who is trying to deny it. Don't know about you, but I can see all sorts of possibilities there... :-)
Anyway, I think the real reason this has taken a while to sink in for me is that as a writer I am the queen of understatement. I don't like writing OTT emotional reactions, especially during love scenes. Which is why I didn't put them in. But, as one of Trish Wylie's lessons pointed out, you can never be too obvious. So I'm going to have to give up my love of the understated look or the many layered piece of dialoge and just be straight up. And boy are those two going to have emotional stuff going on in their scene - I'm going to wring that baby dry.
But if the ed wants to read it, she'll have to ask for the full. ;-)
BTW guys, the old sex without emotion thing was one of the problems the eds mentioned with many of the entries from the last competition. So the lesson is, yes, you can have the sex, but make sure that conflict is front and centre in the scene.
So when I was told the emphasis was too heavy on the sex in the last reject, I was puzzled.
Hey, I thought. Whaddya expect? It was a once night stand, ergo, sex. Anyway, you liked the writing, so what was wrong with it? Too much heat? Or didn't the one nighter work out? Did they get together too quickly? What? What exactly did you mean by 'too much emphasis on sex'??
The problem, gentle reader, has only now sunk in. Having borrowed Maisey's editor decoder ring, I went back over the rejection letter and there it was in black and white - there was no emotion in the scene. What? No emotion? There was plenty! They enjoyed themselves didn't they? Oh sure, but we're not just talking pleasure here, we're talking emotion that is related to the conflict. As Michelle S told me, every scene has to forward the conflict on some level, and that includes the love scenes. So I quickly looked at the rough draft of my Cat/Sean ms to see what I'd done with the love scene. I'd really gone to town with it and it was pretty sexy but sure enough, I'd made the same mistake. No conflict!
Doh!
Glad I picked that one up huh? So how to put conflict in a love scene? Pretty much the same as you do with every scene. What's their conflict? How does that come out during love making? What kind of action would the conflict impel them to take and what would the response be and why? So I've got a guy who likes control with a woman who threatens it. And a spontaneous, impulsive woman who wants an emotional connection with a guy who is trying to deny it. Don't know about you, but I can see all sorts of possibilities there... :-)
Anyway, I think the real reason this has taken a while to sink in for me is that as a writer I am the queen of understatement. I don't like writing OTT emotional reactions, especially during love scenes. Which is why I didn't put them in. But, as one of Trish Wylie's lessons pointed out, you can never be too obvious. So I'm going to have to give up my love of the understated look or the many layered piece of dialoge and just be straight up. And boy are those two going to have emotional stuff going on in their scene - I'm going to wring that baby dry.
But if the ed wants to read it, she'll have to ask for the full. ;-)
BTW guys, the old sex without emotion thing was one of the problems the eds mentioned with many of the entries from the last competition. So the lesson is, yes, you can have the sex, but make sure that conflict is front and centre in the scene.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
The Joy of Rewrites
You may have noticed that I'm not updating my word count bars (or you may not have. You may have better things to do than to check my word count bars!). The simple reason is that I am rewriting and find it too complex dicking around with existing word counts as opposed to rewrite word counts. Anyway, what has been interesting for me is not so much the word counts as the rewriting part. And it's brought me face to face with the reason my revised full was rejected last year.
I didn't rewrite enough.
What I tried to do was to put entirely new conflict into an existing plot structure. I went so far as to write new dialogue and even changed how a scene went. But what I should have done is REWRITE THE ENTIRE THING!
Yes indeedy folks, that would have been the answer. Why? Because with with new conflict, your character becomes a different person. And therefore they would have different responses. Which may mean some scenes are no longer relevant. If you have an existing plot structure, the temptation is to try and keep it, no matter that it may no longer work. And that's when you run into problems because then you start trying to force the characters into behaving the way you want them to instead of how they actually would naturally.
Ah well, I guess that's all part of the learning process. And the main thing is that I now have no qualms about starting from scratch. What I need to do is instead of putting new bits into the old, I need to start with a fresh slate and, if appropriate, but old bits into the new. It certainly has been working for me so far. I am rewriting another favourite ms of mine that will be my next sub and certainly starting afresh seems the best way to tackle it. That way you're not trapped by the stuff you've already written. Starting it new leaves you wide open for all sorts of possibilities.
So how does everyone view rewrites? Is it a chance to make your story stronger? Or is it something that would give you nightmares?
I didn't rewrite enough.
What I tried to do was to put entirely new conflict into an existing plot structure. I went so far as to write new dialogue and even changed how a scene went. But what I should have done is REWRITE THE ENTIRE THING!
Yes indeedy folks, that would have been the answer. Why? Because with with new conflict, your character becomes a different person. And therefore they would have different responses. Which may mean some scenes are no longer relevant. If you have an existing plot structure, the temptation is to try and keep it, no matter that it may no longer work. And that's when you run into problems because then you start trying to force the characters into behaving the way you want them to instead of how they actually would naturally.
Ah well, I guess that's all part of the learning process. And the main thing is that I now have no qualms about starting from scratch. What I need to do is instead of putting new bits into the old, I need to start with a fresh slate and, if appropriate, but old bits into the new. It certainly has been working for me so far. I am rewriting another favourite ms of mine that will be my next sub and certainly starting afresh seems the best way to tackle it. That way you're not trapped by the stuff you've already written. Starting it new leaves you wide open for all sorts of possibilities.
So how does everyone view rewrites? Is it a chance to make your story stronger? Or is it something that would give you nightmares?
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Bad Boys
Here's an interesting question for you: what bad stuff do you think a hero can get away with doing?
The crit group and I were discussing this as I have an ms with a bad boy in it, a bad boy who has left all the bad stuff behind physically but not mentally. Now I'm talking about his teens here, where he went off the rails and got into some trouble. He pulled himself out of it and is now a successful businessman (aren't they all?) but he still feels guilty about this stuff - especially as the heroine persists in thinking he's a great guy but doesn't know about some of the things he did (no this is not the whole of the conflict by the way, it's just a layer).
What I wanted to know was what's acceptable in terms of 'bad stuff'? Obviously violence towards women and kids is a huge no no. So what else? It has to be something that he would feel very bad about but not serious enough to warrant being arrested and going to jail for years and years. And clearly needs to leave him still feeling awful as an adult. The crit group gave me some great ideas but what I'd like to know is what is your particular line in the sand? Is it drugs? Violence (unfemale related)? Alcohol related crimes? Robbery?
Or is it all in the execution?
The crit group and I were discussing this as I have an ms with a bad boy in it, a bad boy who has left all the bad stuff behind physically but not mentally. Now I'm talking about his teens here, where he went off the rails and got into some trouble. He pulled himself out of it and is now a successful businessman (aren't they all?) but he still feels guilty about this stuff - especially as the heroine persists in thinking he's a great guy but doesn't know about some of the things he did (no this is not the whole of the conflict by the way, it's just a layer).
What I wanted to know was what's acceptable in terms of 'bad stuff'? Obviously violence towards women and kids is a huge no no. So what else? It has to be something that he would feel very bad about but not serious enough to warrant being arrested and going to jail for years and years. And clearly needs to leave him still feeling awful as an adult. The crit group gave me some great ideas but what I'd like to know is what is your particular line in the sand? Is it drugs? Violence (unfemale related)? Alcohol related crimes? Robbery?
Or is it all in the execution?
Friday, January 15, 2010
Kreativ Blog Award
Both Kaily Hart and Romy Sommer have nominated me for a Kreativ Blog award - thanks for the kudos guys! - so I'd better get on with it eh? I have to reveal 7 interesting things about me and pass it on to 7 other bloggers. Righto...
7 interesting things about me (well, at least semi-interesting):
1. I took singing lessons and entered competitions (wearing my Doc Martens) when I was in my 20s. Singing opera. Needless to say I don't sing any more, except to my iPod and not opera. I actually still like opera but these days I'm a bit more alternative. ;-)
2. I am a gadget girl (surprise, surprise). Love my iPod, my iPhone, and my PC. I'm now after an ereader.
3. I play computer games. Not so much these days now I write, but I used to love playing The Sims and any fantasy adventure game. I also quite like playing Halo on the xBox (but only with my friends whom I can shoot).
4. I used to swim competitively in my teens. And I hated it (though I still love swimming for fun) which is why I quit.
5. I can ski moderately well. A fact that continues to surprise me whenever I put on a pair of skis as I'm useless with most sports!
6. I love reading Science Fiction. I have umpteen dozen beginnings for many SF stories but never finished any of them. Combining SF and romance would be the best. Sadly M&B have no SF Romance category.
7. I travelled quite a bit when I was overseas years ago. The most unusual place I went to was St Petersburg for two weeks. This may or may not be interesting but I don't meet many Kiwis who have been to Russia.
Seven blogs to nominate (and I'm nominating people here who may not have had this award yet):
Lorraine Wilson
Rachel Johns
Maisey Yates
Joanne Cleary
Judy Jarvie
Suzanne Jones
Lacey Devlin
7 interesting things about me (well, at least semi-interesting):
1. I took singing lessons and entered competitions (wearing my Doc Martens) when I was in my 20s. Singing opera. Needless to say I don't sing any more, except to my iPod and not opera. I actually still like opera but these days I'm a bit more alternative. ;-)
2. I am a gadget girl (surprise, surprise). Love my iPod, my iPhone, and my PC. I'm now after an ereader.
3. I play computer games. Not so much these days now I write, but I used to love playing The Sims and any fantasy adventure game. I also quite like playing Halo on the xBox (but only with my friends whom I can shoot).
4. I used to swim competitively in my teens. And I hated it (though I still love swimming for fun) which is why I quit.
5. I can ski moderately well. A fact that continues to surprise me whenever I put on a pair of skis as I'm useless with most sports!
6. I love reading Science Fiction. I have umpteen dozen beginnings for many SF stories but never finished any of them. Combining SF and romance would be the best. Sadly M&B have no SF Romance category.
7. I travelled quite a bit when I was overseas years ago. The most unusual place I went to was St Petersburg for two weeks. This may or may not be interesting but I don't meet many Kiwis who have been to Russia.
Seven blogs to nominate (and I'm nominating people here who may not have had this award yet):
Lorraine Wilson
Rachel Johns
Maisey Yates
Joanne Cleary
Judy Jarvie
Suzanne Jones
Lacey Devlin
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Heeeerrrre's Jackie!
Hey everyone, I'm back. After 10 days of sea, sand, sandcastles and waaaay too much bubbly, it's back to reality again. To the right there is a small picture of Pataua, the little beach settlement where my husband has a family beach house. It was built by his grandfather way back in the 1930's so it's no palatial mansion. It's what we call a typical Kiwi bach - no TV, tank water which means no showers, no broadband (sniff), and a long drop loo. Oh, okay, there is a flushing loo there now but the long drop is still going. ;-) Anyway, it's pretty much fabulous, made even better by the fact that my iPhone still appeared to receive emails! Yes, I am a very sad person that I cannot even be away one week without checking.The other sad thing about me is that I cannot even be on holiday without writing. I finished re-writing the rest of Cat and Sean's story while I was away. I just got all inspired. It requires a tremendous amount of editing but the bones are there which is very cool. AND I got a new story idea too. Great holiday or what?
I also did some reading and may I say that Natalie Anderson's To Love, Honour and Disobey (out on ebook via M&B UK) is one fabulous read. Really believable characters, great conflict, fab story. So go out and buy it. Yes, go on. Right now. :-)
As for me, I now have to decide which of my many projects to get on with. I have five... ;-)
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Chocks Away!
It's done. Cat and Sean are winging their way to London. Hope they like it over there. Hope the ed likes them. They're really a lovely couple. Much nicer now I know them properly. Sean has been re-alpha'd because the ed warned me not to make him too good. And Cat has been de-immatured.
They have issues though, issues they really need to work through, and I hope they get the chance for their HEA.
Seriously, one thing I'll say for this partial is that it's waaay better than the last one. At least, I think it is. And that's mainly because I know my characters a lot better. Those character bios were a godsend and I can't think why I didn't do them earlier. Maybe one day I won't need them but for now, until I get a handle on this conflict drama, I'll do one for each new story. Before I start writing.
Right, so now I can kick back and relax on the beach holiday we're going on tomorrow. For maybe five minutes. :-) Will get web withdrawal I'm sure of it - which is why I'll be visiting the local WIFI hotspot frequently. Am also taking my trusty laptop so I can rewrite the rest of Cat and Sean's story in the hope they'll want the rest of it. Nothing like starting 2010 with a bit of optimism!
Hope you all have a lovely week or two. Here's to NTAI!
They have issues though, issues they really need to work through, and I hope they get the chance for their HEA.
Seriously, one thing I'll say for this partial is that it's waaay better than the last one. At least, I think it is. And that's mainly because I know my characters a lot better. Those character bios were a godsend and I can't think why I didn't do them earlier. Maybe one day I won't need them but for now, until I get a handle on this conflict drama, I'll do one for each new story. Before I start writing.
Right, so now I can kick back and relax on the beach holiday we're going on tomorrow. For maybe five minutes. :-) Will get web withdrawal I'm sure of it - which is why I'll be visiting the local WIFI hotspot frequently. Am also taking my trusty laptop so I can rewrite the rest of Cat and Sean's story in the hope they'll want the rest of it. Nothing like starting 2010 with a bit of optimism!
Hope you all have a lovely week or two. Here's to NTAI!
Thursday, December 31, 2009
New Year's Eve vs My Partial
Right, well, I suppose I should be thinking about resolutions and whatnot, it being New Year's Eve today. Thing is, I'm not paying attention to anything much (including the kids) because I am totally immersed in fiddling with my partial. In fact, I'd like to give New Year's Eve a total miss so I can get this sucker done and away before we head up north. Is that sad or what?
Anyway, I suppose I should get into the spirit of it and list my goals for 2010:
1. Get published.
2. Get published.
3. Get published.
4. Get published.
5. You getting the idea?
6. Get published.
7. I think you are by now.
8. Get published.
9. Eat chocolate (fooled you there for a minute).
10. Yep, you guessed it, get published.
Here's to a very happy 2010 for everyone! May we all realise at least one of our goals. I can definitely predict that number 9 on my list will come true. :-)
Anyway, I suppose I should get into the spirit of it and list my goals for 2010:
1. Get published.
2. Get published.
3. Get published.
4. Get published.
5. You getting the idea?
6. Get published.
7. I think you are by now.
8. Get published.
9. Eat chocolate (fooled you there for a minute).
10. Yep, you guessed it, get published.
Here's to a very happy 2010 for everyone! May we all realise at least one of our goals. I can definitely predict that number 9 on my list will come true. :-)
Saturday, December 26, 2009
The iPhone Cometh
Yes indeed, Dr Jax came through. There was a large box waiting under the tree for me on Christmas Day and Dr Jax told me to be careful with it as it was heavy and fragile. I was a bit suspicious because he sometimes tricks me by putting small boxes in large ones and I was hoping that the large box was a trick. But then it was very heavy. So I was putting on my determined 'so it's not an iPhone but I will like whatever it is if it kills me' face while I opened the box. And inside was a heavy, rusty piece of iron grille. And underneath that was the iPhone.
My hero. Sigh. :-)
And I had another piece of happy news on Christmas Day too. I had emailed my completed character bios to the editor the night before and was not expecting a reply until next week at the very earliest. But in my inbox on Christmas Day (yes, I turned my PC on, on Christmas Day. Yes I am sad) was a reply saying she'd read them and thought they were good! And that my conflict looked fine and I was to send through my revised synopsis and partial!
So big relief for me. Finally I have some characters that will work and a conflict that looks good from the editors point of view. There were a few issues that she told me to keep an eye out for but I'm hopeful I can avoid them. Now all I have to do is to write a partial that she likes! Easy peasy lemon squeezy.
Yeah, right. :-)
Hope everyone's Christmas was a happy one and here's to a New Year filled with what you love to do best.
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
A Good Old Kiwi Christmas
That blaze of red right there folks (image to you right) is the flower of the Pohutakawa tree, NZ's Christmas tree. And see that beach beyond the flower? That beach (oh, okay, not that particular beach but one fairly similar) is where I'll be the day after New Year. Beaches, sun, sand and Pohutakawa trees are the vital elements of a good, old Kiwi Christmas, which, I know, is inconceivable to all you folk buried deep in the snow.Well, can I say I'm envious? I'd love a white christmas, I really would. I did live in London for a few years but even then we didn't ever have a truly white Christmas. But then again, there is a certain something to sipping Christmas bubbles on the deck in the sun in your t-shirt and then perhaps going for a post-prandial swim... I guess it's all in what you're used to.
Anyway, I'll be be around until after New Year (still waiting on my character tweaks) and then I'll be up north at the beach where there is NO INTERNET! I do not know how I will cope. I'm hoping Santa will bring me an iPhone for Christmas so I won't be completely cut off...:-)
But the point of this blog post (yes, I do have one) is to wish everyone a very happy Christmas and New Year. Here's lots of lovely Kiwi sun and warmth coming to all those in the cold, and to those in the Southern Hemisphere, let's hope it doesn't get too hot!
Friday, December 18, 2009
Dr Jax Stages An Intervention
There I was, throwing myself dramatically on the floor, crying that I couldn't do it, sounding remarkably like my four year old daughter, when Dr Jax at last arrived home from work. Honestly, I don't think he knew what to make of it. No, that's a lie, he knew exactly. I am the biggest drama queen in the world when it comes to my writing. When it's not going right, NOTHING is right. I can't concentrate on anything, I can't do anything, I am a grumpy, horrible, whiny person. Dr Jax knew immediately what the problem was though and, luckily for myself, and for my CPs, he decided to stage an intervention before I bored them all senseless with endless emails of whiny, moany drivel.
Yup, you guessed it, heroine problems. I had changed her conflict so many times it was just one big mess and I couldn't think my way out of it. It's at times like this when I need a cool head to talk me through it and my husband is just amazing with stuff like that. Ten minutes later, a strong martini in hand, I was finally getting to the root of my problem - at least according to Dr Jax.
My heroines, he said, are too perfect. They have no dark sides. Which is very, very true. Not to mention the fact that they are defined by their conflict - like their personalities and their lives are totally formed by that one event. Argh!
However, it's not all bad. After a long talk, aided by more martini and the wonderful ideas and suggestions from my fabulous (not to mention very patient) CPs, I have finally got an idea for a conflict for my heroine. It's not exaggerated (I hope) and she has a personality outside of this
one conflict. I even managed to give her some weaknesses. Woohoo! She's becoming a person! Now all I need to hope is that the editor agrees with this new idea.
So three cheers for Dr Jax. I told him that he could do a guest spot on my blog and everyone could write in with character questions that he could answer. He told me that finally he knew the real reason he went into psychiatry: to help me write my romance novels. :-)
Anyone else had any breakthroughs this week? Or has it been full-on, kicking and screaming on the floor frustration?
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Heroines Behaving Badly
I am going spare trying to figure out the characters of my new submission. The editor has asked me to do character bios of each of them in an effort to get me to focus on characterisation and it's driving me crazy! I think I've got my hero figured out but my heroine refuses to play ball. I have no idea why I can't write her but it's incredibly annoying. Why are women so difficult?? :-)
Anyway, for those of you thinking the editor is gently holding my hand, no she is not. She called my heroine childish and immature, not to mention unnattractive. No words have been minced there. The really irritating thing is that the ed is right. I don't think Cat is like that in the partial but the fact remains that her conflict is only half thought out. Which is my fault.
It wasn't all bad. She liked some of the actions my characters took (which is solely down to Michelle S's expert advice) and she really liked the central theme. Which is why, I'm assuming, she is giving me the chance to do this story but with fully-fledged characters.
So, I have sent her some more ideas about the backgrounds for both characters and she said she'd get back to me with tweaks. Haven't heard yet but since then I've gone through yet another set of ideas for my heroine. I am now officially sick of her.
The problems I'm having though are mainly because of the way I write which is writing my way into my characters. They have a half thought of background when I start but I don't know really what they're all about until the end. And that is not working for me clearly. I need to know all about them from the first page. I need to forget about the external conflict that brings them together and start from a core of internal conflict, building the rest of the character around that. And I need to do that before I start writing because working backwards like this is very, very hard. It's hard because I'm desperate to keep some of the things the editor liked but I'm not sure, given my heroine's new background, whether she would still act in the same way. And if I'm not sure, then she probably wouldn't, which means I'll probably have to change those bits. Changing bits the editor liked is NOT easy but then again, acting unbelievably is one of my heroine's main failings so therefore I have to change them. Argh!
Okay, I'm now officially, officially sick of my heroine and am going to take the day off her. Big hugs to all of you who got the dreaded R from the competition. Remember an R does not mean you or your writing sucks. It just wasn't the right story.
Anyway, for those of you thinking the editor is gently holding my hand, no she is not. She called my heroine childish and immature, not to mention unnattractive. No words have been minced there. The really irritating thing is that the ed is right. I don't think Cat is like that in the partial but the fact remains that her conflict is only half thought out. Which is my fault.
It wasn't all bad. She liked some of the actions my characters took (which is solely down to Michelle S's expert advice) and she really liked the central theme. Which is why, I'm assuming, she is giving me the chance to do this story but with fully-fledged characters.
So, I have sent her some more ideas about the backgrounds for both characters and she said she'd get back to me with tweaks. Haven't heard yet but since then I've gone through yet another set of ideas for my heroine. I am now officially sick of her.
The problems I'm having though are mainly because of the way I write which is writing my way into my characters. They have a half thought of background when I start but I don't know really what they're all about until the end. And that is not working for me clearly. I need to know all about them from the first page. I need to forget about the external conflict that brings them together and start from a core of internal conflict, building the rest of the character around that. And I need to do that before I start writing because working backwards like this is very, very hard. It's hard because I'm desperate to keep some of the things the editor liked but I'm not sure, given my heroine's new background, whether she would still act in the same way. And if I'm not sure, then she probably wouldn't, which means I'll probably have to change those bits. Changing bits the editor liked is NOT easy but then again, acting unbelievably is one of my heroine's main failings so therefore I have to change them. Argh!
Okay, I'm now officially, officially sick of my heroine and am going to take the day off her. Big hugs to all of you who got the dreaded R from the competition. Remember an R does not mean you or your writing sucks. It just wasn't the right story.
Monday, December 14, 2009
On Contests
I wasn't going to weigh in to the fray with the palaver happening on the I Heart Presents site, but I wanted to say a couple of things in response. No, not controversial stuff, there's enough of that floating around at the moment I 'm thinking, it's just something to think about.
I pretty much just wanted to remind everyone that a contest win doesn't automatically equal publication. Nor does a contest placing. If it did, I'd be published by now. All a contest is, is a faster-than-normal submission process. If you'd worked hard on your chapter and synopsis, and subbed them the normal way, the response you would get would be exactly the same. Some will get requests and some will get rejections.
Oh, but you say, didn't the winners get an editor for a year? That's different from the normal sub process. Well, actually no it's not any different. Because it's been a year since my contest placing and I am still working with an editor. And I was working with an editor before my placing too so me getting runner up in Feel the Heat really had nothing to do with it. It got a manuscript seen faster probably but that's it. They're not going to publish me because I got somewhere in a contest, they're going to publish me because I can write a book they want to publish. I know, it's all very well for me to say that but if you don't take my word for it, take Maisey's. She submitted through the slush, spent a year working with an editor, and sold. That's the prize right there, no contest required.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that you don't need a contest placing to win the prize. If the editors see potential, they'll want to see more of what you have. And people always forget that even when you do get to have that wonderful feedback, it's not the end. No, it's just the beginning of how hard you need to work. Winning an editor for a year, whether through the slush or the contest, means a year of slogging your guts out. And even when you do slog, you may not be published. Because that last part - writing a publishable book - is all dependent on you, your ability to take criticism and your skill as a writer to apply it to your manuscript, not a contest placing.
No part of this process is easy. Contests are great ways to polish up something for a deadline and get a response to a submission quickly. But they are not the only way. Keep submitting. That's all you can do.
I pretty much just wanted to remind everyone that a contest win doesn't automatically equal publication. Nor does a contest placing. If it did, I'd be published by now. All a contest is, is a faster-than-normal submission process. If you'd worked hard on your chapter and synopsis, and subbed them the normal way, the response you would get would be exactly the same. Some will get requests and some will get rejections.
Oh, but you say, didn't the winners get an editor for a year? That's different from the normal sub process. Well, actually no it's not any different. Because it's been a year since my contest placing and I am still working with an editor. And I was working with an editor before my placing too so me getting runner up in Feel the Heat really had nothing to do with it. It got a manuscript seen faster probably but that's it. They're not going to publish me because I got somewhere in a contest, they're going to publish me because I can write a book they want to publish. I know, it's all very well for me to say that but if you don't take my word for it, take Maisey's. She submitted through the slush, spent a year working with an editor, and sold. That's the prize right there, no contest required.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that you don't need a contest placing to win the prize. If the editors see potential, they'll want to see more of what you have. And people always forget that even when you do get to have that wonderful feedback, it's not the end. No, it's just the beginning of how hard you need to work. Winning an editor for a year, whether through the slush or the contest, means a year of slogging your guts out. And even when you do slog, you may not be published. Because that last part - writing a publishable book - is all dependent on you, your ability to take criticism and your skill as a writer to apply it to your manuscript, not a contest placing.
No part of this process is easy. Contests are great ways to polish up something for a deadline and get a response to a submission quickly. But they are not the only way. Keep submitting. That's all you can do.
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Presents Competition - Congrats!
Hey, big huge congrats to the winners of the Presents Writing Competion! To get so far out of so many entries is a huge acheivement. Chocolate martinis and champagne cocktails all round.
Especially to fellow aspirant MH author and MH winner, Gill (AKA Jilly). I've only just met you but your talent is truly inspiring. Can't wait to read the book!
In other positive news, I have heard back from the ed. She wants me to send her detailed character back-stories for Cat and Sean before a partial and a synopsis. So I'm still in the game here! Now this is something I should have done way back when and just didn't because I'm so damn impatient to get to writing the story. No longer!
So this weekend is my time to sort out just who my characters are. I'm going to write detailed backstories for them, why they are the people they are when the story opens. Very excited as this feels like I'm finally getting to the root of my problems with conflict...
More next week!
Especially to fellow aspirant MH author and MH winner, Gill (AKA Jilly). I've only just met you but your talent is truly inspiring. Can't wait to read the book!
In other positive news, I have heard back from the ed. She wants me to send her detailed character back-stories for Cat and Sean before a partial and a synopsis. So I'm still in the game here! Now this is something I should have done way back when and just didn't because I'm so damn impatient to get to writing the story. No longer!
So this weekend is my time to sort out just who my characters are. I'm going to write detailed backstories for them, why they are the people they are when the story opens. Very excited as this feels like I'm finally getting to the root of my problems with conflict...
More next week!
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Romance Writer, Amateur Psychologist
Why psychology? Because I got feedback about my synopsis and, yes, there were problems. Guess where my problems were? Yup, the evil heroine strikes again! Hero had potential, heroine...childish and immature.
Groan! I'll be honest here, I did wonder when I was writing this story, whether her conflict was right. Halfway through the book I was going um...not sure about this...but I persevered hoping it would fix itself. But it didn't. So Jackie's number one rule is going to be: Go with your gut! If it's not working for you then it's not working full stop!
Right, so where to from here? Well, I'm going to go with fixing this one because in spite of evidence to the contrary, I do feel like I'm getting there with fully backgrounding my characters. Kate, for a start, is much more fully realised than Cat is. And that's mainly due to me thinking long and hard about Kate before I started writing. Plus, I like this story.
What I should be doing is taking advice from all you people who do character sketches before writing. Either that or I do what I usually do which is to write my way into my characters, finish the ms, and then write the synopsis. Impatience is my besetting sin and does not help in my writing!
The one thing that does console me is that the editor did tell me that writing romance with psychologically compelling, believable characters is very, very difficult. Hear that everyone? This is HARD stuff we're doing. We have to have strong conflict but it has to be light and flirty. It has to extend to 50k but you can't have any external conflict. It has to be sympathetic but not too specific. It has to have the fantasy factor. These are not easy things to accomplish. In fact, I was having a moan to a good friend of mine who is very, very literary and she said, 'Actually, what you're writing is very difficult isn't it?' And I thought, no kidding! Category romance is a tough beast.
Anyway, the other thing that keeps me going is this: the ed told me that my writing was all there and that once I got the characterisation right, I'll be away.
So, you see, I simply have to keep going. :-)
Groan! I'll be honest here, I did wonder when I was writing this story, whether her conflict was right. Halfway through the book I was going um...not sure about this...but I persevered hoping it would fix itself. But it didn't. So Jackie's number one rule is going to be: Go with your gut! If it's not working for you then it's not working full stop!
Right, so where to from here? Well, I'm going to go with fixing this one because in spite of evidence to the contrary, I do feel like I'm getting there with fully backgrounding my characters. Kate, for a start, is much more fully realised than Cat is. And that's mainly due to me thinking long and hard about Kate before I started writing. Plus, I like this story.
What I should be doing is taking advice from all you people who do character sketches before writing. Either that or I do what I usually do which is to write my way into my characters, finish the ms, and then write the synopsis. Impatience is my besetting sin and does not help in my writing!
The one thing that does console me is that the editor did tell me that writing romance with psychologically compelling, believable characters is very, very difficult. Hear that everyone? This is HARD stuff we're doing. We have to have strong conflict but it has to be light and flirty. It has to extend to 50k but you can't have any external conflict. It has to be sympathetic but not too specific. It has to have the fantasy factor. These are not easy things to accomplish. In fact, I was having a moan to a good friend of mine who is very, very literary and she said, 'Actually, what you're writing is very difficult isn't it?' And I thought, no kidding! Category romance is a tough beast.
Anyway, the other thing that keeps me going is this: the ed told me that my writing was all there and that once I got the characterisation right, I'll be away.
So, you see, I simply have to keep going. :-)
Monday, December 7, 2009
The Red String Bracelet Or The Problem with Quirks
Thanks everyone for the great input on my last post! Got some great ideas. You rock, did you know that? Anyway, still on the subject of my difficulties with heroines, I had a bit of a brainwave today. It actually happened while I was doing a pilates class (as you do). I realised that in order to do some of the exercises, I was over-compensating for my weak arms by using my shoulders, which are really strong. I know, what's your point Jackie? Well, the point is that I am doing something similiar with my heroines. In order to cover my weak character development, I have been over-relying on quirks to make my heroines different.
Kate is a case in point. She started out a hippy because I didn't really understand conflict at the time and making her a stereotype was an easy way of characterising her. Bad move. And I think that's why I'm finding it difficult to get a handle on her now because once I take away the stereotype, where is my character? In stripping her of her quirks (eco beliefs, nose-ring) I've exposed the fact that she has no real conflict. She's just a cardboard cutout. So I have to go back to basics, dig deep to find out who she is. Build up a real background with real problems.
Once I've got that, I can add those quirks back again - but only if they are true to the person she is now. Because although quirks aren't bad, if you're going to use them there has to be a reason for them. I think I've mentioned this before in other posts but if, for example, you take the time to mention your heroine's love of sparkly red shoes, you should then also explain why she likes them. Is she like Dorothy and they represent escape? And if so, what is she escaping and why?
Kate, for example, has retained one of her old quirks (no, not the nose-ring). She wears a friendship bracelet of red string around one wrist. Now, in the old draft there wasn't any reason for behind this, she wore it because I put it there. In the new draft however, she wears it because her brother gave it to her before he left to go overseas. She hasn't seen him in years and for her, it represents his connection to her. And now, because I've linked it to her conflict, it also represents the family that she once had and loved, and that is slowly slipping away from her. Now, I'm sure Alex will make a comment on this bracelet and perhaps it'll come to mean something for him too. Perhaps, once I write the thing, he'll help Kate to change its meaning so that it doesn't represent what she lost, but what remains strong. Because he has his own lesson to teach her, just as she has something to teach him.
Anyway, all this has been great distraction from the waiting. So, anyone else have a problem with unexplainable quirks?
Kate is a case in point. She started out a hippy because I didn't really understand conflict at the time and making her a stereotype was an easy way of characterising her. Bad move. And I think that's why I'm finding it difficult to get a handle on her now because once I take away the stereotype, where is my character? In stripping her of her quirks (eco beliefs, nose-ring) I've exposed the fact that she has no real conflict. She's just a cardboard cutout. So I have to go back to basics, dig deep to find out who she is. Build up a real background with real problems.
Once I've got that, I can add those quirks back again - but only if they are true to the person she is now. Because although quirks aren't bad, if you're going to use them there has to be a reason for them. I think I've mentioned this before in other posts but if, for example, you take the time to mention your heroine's love of sparkly red shoes, you should then also explain why she likes them. Is she like Dorothy and they represent escape? And if so, what is she escaping and why?
Kate, for example, has retained one of her old quirks (no, not the nose-ring). She wears a friendship bracelet of red string around one wrist. Now, in the old draft there wasn't any reason for behind this, she wore it because I put it there. In the new draft however, she wears it because her brother gave it to her before he left to go overseas. She hasn't seen him in years and for her, it represents his connection to her. And now, because I've linked it to her conflict, it also represents the family that she once had and loved, and that is slowly slipping away from her. Now, I'm sure Alex will make a comment on this bracelet and perhaps it'll come to mean something for him too. Perhaps, once I write the thing, he'll help Kate to change its meaning so that it doesn't represent what she lost, but what remains strong. Because he has his own lesson to teach her, just as she has something to teach him.
Anyway, all this has been great distraction from the waiting. So, anyone else have a problem with unexplainable quirks?
Friday, December 4, 2009
Difficult Heroines
Right, well, no news for me this week. But I'm good with that. No, really, I am. Patience is a virtue and one I'm slowly learning. Certainly Maisey's 20 month wait for her Call is a fantastic lesson in good things come to those who wait. So I shall continue waiting.
In the meantime, I am wrestling with Kate. She's my hippy heroine who now isn't so much hippy as an architect of eco-friendly houses. And I'm wrestling with her because I am having a few problems getting a handle on her character. Does anyone else have this problem at times? Now she's an architect instead of a protestor, her character has - naturally enough - changed and I can't seem to figure her out. I had to change her from my FTH entry because in that story she had no conflict at all and - I have to admit - did come over as a little bit shrill. And as Alex is, in my updated story, quite a strong alpha, she does have to hold her own against him. So far she's managing to do that but in a quietly strong way, which surprised me because I had imagined her as fiery. But no, apparently not.
One of my problems, see, is that I write myself into my characters. The more of the story I write, the more they reveal themselves. Which is great if it wasn't for my anal-ness with regard to first chapters. I really, really like to have my first chapter as done as it can be before I write the rest of it. It's the set-up for the whole book you see and if it's not working, I can't write the rest. If I have a good first chapter, then the rest of the first draft can be as dirty as it gets, that doesn't matter, just as long as that first part is done. But if I write myself into my characters, I usually don't know much about them in the first chapter so sometimes their character is 'off' and hence the first chapter doesn't go well. You see my conundrum? So with Kate, I'm really finding it difficult to progress the story because I can't get past my first chapter difficulties with her.
However, in the interests of progress and getting words down, I have pushed through my first chapter woes and am writing further on in the hope that Kate will stop being such a changeable little thing and settle down. In fact I often do this too, just push through. Sometimes I'll even skip a scene that isn't working and go on to the next one. This can work well as usually the scene I'll have problems with either turns out to be unnecessary or different in some way that I wasn't aware of until I skipped it.
So what does everyone else do when they have problems with their ms or one of their characters? Long wistful walks in flowing white gowns through fields of sunflowers? Cleaning the shower? Throwing yourself dramatically on the couch and declaring you're a hopeless writer, you'll never get anywhere and you don't know why you bother? *puts up hand*. :-)
In the meantime, I am wrestling with Kate. She's my hippy heroine who now isn't so much hippy as an architect of eco-friendly houses. And I'm wrestling with her because I am having a few problems getting a handle on her character. Does anyone else have this problem at times? Now she's an architect instead of a protestor, her character has - naturally enough - changed and I can't seem to figure her out. I had to change her from my FTH entry because in that story she had no conflict at all and - I have to admit - did come over as a little bit shrill. And as Alex is, in my updated story, quite a strong alpha, she does have to hold her own against him. So far she's managing to do that but in a quietly strong way, which surprised me because I had imagined her as fiery. But no, apparently not.
One of my problems, see, is that I write myself into my characters. The more of the story I write, the more they reveal themselves. Which is great if it wasn't for my anal-ness with regard to first chapters. I really, really like to have my first chapter as done as it can be before I write the rest of it. It's the set-up for the whole book you see and if it's not working, I can't write the rest. If I have a good first chapter, then the rest of the first draft can be as dirty as it gets, that doesn't matter, just as long as that first part is done. But if I write myself into my characters, I usually don't know much about them in the first chapter so sometimes their character is 'off' and hence the first chapter doesn't go well. You see my conundrum? So with Kate, I'm really finding it difficult to progress the story because I can't get past my first chapter difficulties with her.
However, in the interests of progress and getting words down, I have pushed through my first chapter woes and am writing further on in the hope that Kate will stop being such a changeable little thing and settle down. In fact I often do this too, just push through. Sometimes I'll even skip a scene that isn't working and go on to the next one. This can work well as usually the scene I'll have problems with either turns out to be unnecessary or different in some way that I wasn't aware of until I skipped it.
So what does everyone else do when they have problems with their ms or one of their characters? Long wistful walks in flowing white gowns through fields of sunflowers? Cleaning the shower? Throwing yourself dramatically on the couch and declaring you're a hopeless writer, you'll never get anywhere and you don't know why you bother? *puts up hand*. :-)
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
This Is Why We Do This - Congrats Maisey!
We do this so that one day we might actually be published authors. Like Maisey Yates. This damn fine woman got the call yesterday and I would just like to sent out a huge...
(no, get your mind out of the gutter)...
WOOHOO!!!!
Presents/Modern's brand new author is not only a very cool person but a great writer too. It's enough to make a girl simply green... ;-)
Well done, Maisey. Can't wait until your book comes out!
(no, get your mind out of the gutter)...
WOOHOO!!!!
Presents/Modern's brand new author is not only a very cool person but a great writer too. It's enough to make a girl simply green... ;-)
Well done, Maisey. Can't wait until your book comes out!
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Why Do We Do This Again??
I should imagine that I'm not the only aspiring romance author who is feeling sick at this moment in time. Hands up all those who entered the Modern/Modern Heat writing contest! It's a horrible feeling eh? Knowing a decision is being made, one that is all about your hopes and dreams, and knowing that you will have absolutely no control over it. Gah, it's enough to make anyone reach for the bucket.
So why am I sick? Well, I didn't enter the contest but I have heard that the lovely editor who is (un)fortunate enough to read my stuff is getting to my synopsis this week. So every morning I open my email program with huge amounts of trepidation. What I'm hoping for is a 'yes, this might work if you change this, this and this'. What I'm terrified of recieving is 'never on God's green earth would we want to publish this tripe'. Because no matter how good we think our story is, the fact is that we don't know until the editor says yes. I think my story is good, at least I really enjoyed writing it and it was certainly better than the last one. But who knows? There may be some kind of fatal flaw in it that I haven't spotted.
Anyway, the annoying thing is that usually the best way to cope with these sick feelings is to write something but I can't concentrate on writing anything at the moment. Grump. Grump. Perhaps taking Great Uncle Visa out for a little tootle round the shops is in order. Sadly he hasn't recovered from the last pair of NTAI shoes I bought so maybe I'll have to go easy on him.
So, what do other people do to when they don't want to think about what's going down over in Richmond?
So why am I sick? Well, I didn't enter the contest but I have heard that the lovely editor who is (un)fortunate enough to read my stuff is getting to my synopsis this week. So every morning I open my email program with huge amounts of trepidation. What I'm hoping for is a 'yes, this might work if you change this, this and this'. What I'm terrified of recieving is 'never on God's green earth would we want to publish this tripe'. Because no matter how good we think our story is, the fact is that we don't know until the editor says yes. I think my story is good, at least I really enjoyed writing it and it was certainly better than the last one. But who knows? There may be some kind of fatal flaw in it that I haven't spotted.
Anyway, the annoying thing is that usually the best way to cope with these sick feelings is to write something but I can't concentrate on writing anything at the moment. Grump. Grump. Perhaps taking Great Uncle Visa out for a little tootle round the shops is in order. Sadly he hasn't recovered from the last pair of NTAI shoes I bought so maybe I'll have to go easy on him.
So, what do other people do to when they don't want to think about what's going down over in Richmond?
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